Envy or Acceptance?

Since early this year, my Facebook wall has been flooded with pregnancy announcements. I am sincerely happy for my friends and/or relatives but a part of me is dying of envy.

 My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for our second baby since last year. I went through three cycles of duphaston-clomid-TV ultrasound-pregnyl just to end up unsuccessful. After the third attempt, I resolved to take a rest as the cycles can be physically and financially exhausting. I also joined a new employer and it was another reason for putting our baby plans on hold. Nevertheless, the disappointing results does not stop me from wishing that we too will be joining the dragon baby rush. There are also numerous comments lately coming from friends and relatives to give Basti a baby sister or brother but my body refuses to cooperate again.

 I've been trying to tamp down on the envy part and concentrate on being happy with just having Basti. Though a part of my still prays for another child, I will resolve to accept God's will for us. If He says that having one child is enough then I guess it's just something that I have to accept.