Saturday, January 31, 2004

Poetry Challenge

I managed to catch Body Challenge today at Discovery Channel. Friends have been telling me about the show but I never got the chance to watch it until this evening. It was indeed an enjoyable watch and inspiring to boot. Now I know there's hope for me.

Had a short swim this evening. After sweating it out at the treadmill and reclining bike, my officemate and I trudged off to the jacuzzi and enjoyed a warm relaxing soak. After 15 minutes, I slid into the pool and did some laps. It was embarrassing that my endurance succumbed after 3 laps. Maybe a few more cardio exercises will do the trick.

During a YM conversation with a friend this evening, he suggested that I post my past poems in my blog for people to read. I've always considered my poetry unremarkable (and I don't mean that in a good sort of way) so I never found the significance of posting my literary fruits. But I figured I did enjoy writing them and reading them now, they're not too bad. So you're welcome to visit SmeoP by Sunshine. Fair warning though, I'm posting ALL the poems that I wrote. So some of them can get really tacky and saccharine. There are a few notable ones, but as said, they're just few.

Sunday, January 25, 2004

Kung Hei Fat Choi

Which does not literally mean Happy New Year but something like Good Luck (I may be wrong). But anyway, it's what non-Chinese people and probably Chinese people say to each other during the Lunar New Year.

I was a bit disconcerted when I received two whole wheels of tikoy (ricecakes) this year. I have never received a full box of tikoy before. I just remember one instance where Allan brought a whole tupperware of cooked tikoy at school and everyone grabbed at it like it was mana from heaven. I do not fully understand the significance of the food (something about luck), but I was still touched nevertheless. What made me feel disconcerted was that it's something that I won't be able to eat. My diet officially started last Wednesday and it was a big radical change for me. I had to watch everything I eat like a hawk and egg-wrapped fried tikoy is definitely one thing off my things-to-eat list.

I suddenly remembered my dinner last night. A couple of friends and I went to Burgoo's at Rockwell for dinner. I was debating whether to get the baby back ribs with shrimp or the seafood ceasar's salad. The salad eventually won and it was very delicious! The leaves were just fine as well as the dressing and the shrimps and calamares on top were scrumptious! Although I don't know whether it's really delicious or it was only metal. :)

I have one big project scheduled which would take the whole year to finish. Actually, my deadline is on December 28 so I hope I can finish that project. I'm taking it one baby step at a time and I mean baby steps. Hopefully the fruits of my labor won't be in vain. I have shown people the first results and they're all very happy about it. Hopefully, I'll be able to finish it.

I can't believe I got sick. It was something I did not expect. It started off as a sore throat last Wednesday. My staff who was supposed to be a temporary replacement for my staff who went on maternity leave, called last Monday and left a message that she's taking the whole week off to get married. That incident left me in distress with no choice but to take on the slack. Unfortunately, the job requires me to be on the phone stretching to one hour with just one bank. That strained my voice and left me with the sore throat. Unluckily, my sore throat developed into a cold and now a cough leaving me with no voice at all. I try not to panic since we have a group report on Monday and Thursday. Oh wait, I think I have a bottle of salabat somewhere which I can drink. I think I'll visit the clinic tomorrow and have this checked.

Sunday, January 18, 2004

Six Weddings and a Funeral

I attended a record-breaking 6 weddings last year. Three are officemates and the other three are good friends. This year, I was greeted by news of two deaths and now, the death of the husband of the sister of my grandmother. As far as I'm concerned, it was a distant relative but my grandmother, grandfather and dad thought differently. Since I had no excuse not to go with them, I reluctantly joined them this morning at La Paz Sucat (inside Manila Memorial Park).

The Paz building in Sucat is relatively new. I deduced this by just looking at the modern design and the well-kept interior. The lobby looks as if I entered a hotel (complete with the concierge and elevator).

I spent the whole morning sitting there all sleepy and knowing no one except my grandparents and father. Most of the people spoke in Kapampangan which further alienated me (I only know "ditak" of the vernacular). Using the cold as an excuse, I went down to the lobby and ensconced myself on one of the comfy couches there and took a nap. I went back upstairs when the mass was about to start.

It has been a long time ever since I attended an actual burial. Most of the time, I just go to the wake and that's it. The last time that I recall attending a burial was that of my great grandmother. I was 5 that time. I did not even attended the burial of my maternal grandfather who died 11 years ago. I recall one of their "pamahiin" was to pass the kids over the coffin, for whatever purpose, I do not know. I'm glad that they did not observe any "pamahiin" this time.

I thought that since I was a distant relative, I won't be affected by the homily and ceremony following the mass. I was sorely mistaken.

During the priest's homily, I could feel the tears pricking the back of my eyes but I held them valiantly at bay. It was the eulogy given by the only son which made the tears fall and made me sniffle. It was very touching and I could not help but cry.

I wanted to go home after the mass but my grandparents were on their way to the burial site within the Manila Memorial grounds so I had no choice but to follow.

While we were in the car following the funeral procession, I could not help but look at the other tombs in the area. I marveled at the breath-taking mausoleums (e.g. the one near the entrance. The design would remind you of the Parthenon) and at how serene and peaceful everything is. It's really a good place where one can be laid to rest.

The burial plot is located a few meters from the river bed. There was this contraption which would lower the coffin gently down into the earth. The last goodbyes were really tear-jerking, moreover, accompanied by a guy singing with his guitar. He sang bible psalms and his tenor voice made me think of John Denver. The family was crying so much and it took awhile before they were able to say goodbye. They asked that happy birthday be sung because today also happens to be the birthday of the deceased. Of course, there was nothing happy on the way they sang it but it was the thought that counts.

One thing that I'll always remember of this day is what my grandfather said while we were waiting for the mass to start. He mentioned that he wants to be cremated immediately when his time will come. There will still be a wake but instead of a coffin, there's just his ashes and his picture. I just nodded when he said that but I could feel the tears starting again so I just changed the topic. I love my lolo very much, moreover the point that he and I are so much alike. We share the same interests in literature and history (I got my addiction to books from him, as well as my creative writing side). Anyway, I hope that day won't be near in coming. My grandfather's lineage is blessed with long lives. I hope he lives more than a hundred. Heck, his eldest sister is already 103. He has 20 years to go and hopefully by that time, I already have a husband and kids who he can also be proud of.

Sunday, January 11, 2004

Returning to the King

I will never get tired watching this movie.

My dad and I were supposed to watch this movie this afternoon at Greenbelt. I never realized, even with almost all of the theaters in Greenbelt are showing the film, that we would run out of slots. We were there by 1 pm and the tickets that were left are those for the 8 pm showing. We decided to go home and watch the pirated copy instead.

Even if I've watched it 4 times already, I still cried when Aragorn bowed before the hobbits and when Frodo left with the elves. I let the tears fall but the sobs I kept tightly in check. That would've been embarrassing.

I said it before and I'll say it again. This is definitely the best movie ever made.

Thursday, January 08, 2004


Third term for this school year started yesterday and I had my first class today. Subject is Management Science. Teacher looks cute enough and I could not help but stare at him throughout the duration of the class. I tried to absorb whatever it was he was teaching (a mixture of Quantitative Techniques and Statistics) but my mind was wandering off due to hunger and a nagging headache.

This looks like an interesting class although I miss my old groupmates, Jek and Ryan. We were divided into 4 groups comprising of 10 people each. I'm not used to working with a large group so I hope I'll survive this.

I'll have my Financial Accounting class on Monday. According to friends who had him, the teacher that I got is quite good so hopefully I'll survive that too.

I got my grades for last term's classes and I'm proud to say that I got a 4.0 for both subjects. I guess my "seriousness" paid off--landing me on the dean's list. Muwahahaha.


There's some kind of SARS-scare going around again due to the sudden rise of flu cases in Manila. I also learned today that a friend has chicken pox. I called him up on his cell to find out how he is and all the while laughing at his condition. It was really bad of me but I could not help it since he's 31 years old and here he is afflicted with a disease usually associated with children. Nevertheless, I still wished for him to get better. He did sound like a kid complaining about the sores and wishing he can get out of the house.


I got a copy of the LOTR soundtrack courtesy of an "optimistic" MBA friend (you know who you are) and who I am really indebted to. I felt a nice thrill while listening to the lyric-less songs (except a few by Enya but who's lyrics I can't even understand). I just need the last movie to complete my extended DVD collection.

Saturday, January 03, 2004


According to reviews, especially that of Nestor U. Torre (whose reviews I take into heart), gave this filmfest movie a good rating. That was why I was a bit perturbed when I came out of the cinema feeling a bit unsettled and unhappy over what I have watched.

While waiting for my friend, I tried to sort the movie out in my mind and why it made me feel those things. Was it the scenes of gyrating men in a gay bar? Was it the quickie scene of Tate in the elevator? Was it the the two-timing of Sonia? I then realized that it was because I could relate to the movie and what I saw somehow made me come face to face with what I have refused to acknowledged for so long.

Many people have told me that I have an uncanny resemblance to Cherry Pie Picache. It made me feel disconcerted seeing her in the big screen with all that added poundage. It made me feel like I was the one up there showing all the people how rounded I am (e.g. scene of Picache's character stripping for consultation for liposuction). Heck, her character has the same age as I do! What made me feel worse was how Cherry Pie's character resolved everything in the end. She "lived happily ever after" when she got thin and got back with her stripper-boyfriend. That scene imparts a message that one will only be happy if she loses weight. I do acknowledge the importance of losing weight and how being fat can be bad for the health, but do they have to foist that fact to the audience? Can't one have a happy ending and be rubenesque at the same time?

However, I do like the part where she still found love in an unusual person and for that person to still love here inspite of what she looked like. It made me think that there's still hope for me and my non-existent lovelife.

Facing something which you so long refused to acknowledge can be very difficult to do. But here it is in front of me. Grabbing hold of my chin and making me see who I really am.


My grandfather is 84 and at his age, he refuses to lie down and rest. He's still full of energy and one of his quirks is to visit places that he reads on the papers. In the past month, I've been to two places which he invited me to visit with him.

Last month, we went to Intramuros to see the Light and Sound show. He was very impressed with the show and being vocal that he is, he expressed his admiration to the person in charge. I bet there is an entry of that show in his journal.

This morning, we went to the Angono Caves in Rizal. Angono is known as a haven for artists. It was not much of a surprise for a cave having etchings dating back to 3000 B.C. According to the caretaker, the cave was discovered around the 1960's. Afterwhich, the cave was placed under the "100 Most Endangered Archeological Sites in the World". We're actually #72. I marvelled at the etchings engraved on the adobe walls. Too bad we could not get near the cave. We had to stay on a wooden platform. I so wanted to touch the walls.

The place is being funded by the government but I can't see much of it. In order to get to the caves, you have to get your car through this dark and cramped tunnel. Afterwhich, you have to negotiate through very large rocks. I thought that our little Honda Hatchback would not be able to make it, but I'm glad she was able to pull through.

It was lunch time when we left the caves. We went to this place called "Balaw-Balaw" where we had lunch. It's a nice little specialty restaurant which has it's own museum featuring Vocalan. Personally, I'm not much of a fan of his artwork. It was too dark. I like paintings that are bright and I specifically like paintings of nipa huts or ricefields. I saw this really gorgeous painting at Megamall where the painter managed to draw every grain of rice. It was very breathtaking. If I had the money, I would've bought that painting and placed it in my room. Maybe that's what I'm going to ask for next year from my artist friends--a painting of a rice field with a nipa hut in the background. That would really be nice.


It's the 3rd day of the new year and I managed to finish one project already. Last January 1, I spent it cleaning my room. I wiped and dusted all my books and every corner of my room. I finished cataloguing all my books as well. As of last count, I have 416 books in my database. All that's left is to label my bookshelves.

Thursday, January 01, 2004


I know that I'm a bookworm but I think I went overboard this time around.

Allan introduced me to this addicting game thru his PDA. I remember we were at Intramuros Starbucks waiting for our friends from their wall-adventure and he took out his nifty PDA and showed me the game. I was instantly hooked! When it was time for us to go, I did not want to let go of the thing. I was only able to download a pc version of the game a couple of days ago. And I haven't slept properly ever since.

One game can go on and on until your library gets burned down by the glowing red letters. I've reached "thesaurian" status already (translated to around 400 thousand points and more), but much to my frustration, the copy that I downloaded has a trial period. So here I am, surfing for either a cracker or a cracked game.

Other than that, Lord of the Rings has been keeping me awake. I've also gotten addicted to the trilogy. Watching it again and again and treating my extended editions with tlc.


This is the most subdued New Year that I have ever had. Subdued in a sense that we don't have any celebration whatsoever. There are only 3 of us in the house and we were in our own rooms throughout the New Year. My dad and I were downstairs at the stroke of midnight, however, the smoke drove us indoors, not to mention the sudden loss of electricity.

We earlier had dinner at my grandparents' house in Makati. But we only stayed until 9 pm, afterwhich, we came home with us doing our own thing. me on the computer trying to find a Mbookworm cracker, my sister in her room sleeping and my dad tinkering in the garage. I wasn't able to cook anything tonight due to lack of time. I was in Batangas earlier in the day to visit my new inaanak. My brother and I got home around 10 pm which was too late to do the groceries. We decided to forgo the fireworks and media noche this time around. It's as if, we have no reason to celebrate. But then, we could only be lazy.

Nevertheless, here's greeting a Happy New Year to all. May this new year bring more joy, peace and happiness to all. God bless!


It's that time of year when you plan to make changes in your life yet year and year again, your life still remains the same. Therefore, I'm not going to make resolutions, instead, I'm going to plan projects.

So far, I have thought of two main projects (things to do) which I plan to do this year. First of all is to learn how to drive. It's really a big advantange for me to know how to drive a car. I have the freedom to go anywhere I like and I don't have to depend on my brother/dad to pick me up or whatever.

My second project is to finish cataloguing all my books. I'm creating a database of all my books and thinking of a nice way to file them (like a dewey decimal system). At estimate, I have around 500 or so books. That's why I dream of someday owning a house/apartment with one airconditioned room solely dedicated to my books. Right now, they're deteriorating because of the humidity and heat. I can't read my old books anymore because I end up coughing and sneezing whenever I open them.