Sunday, January 18, 2004

Six Weddings and a Funeral

I attended a record-breaking 6 weddings last year. Three are officemates and the other three are good friends. This year, I was greeted by news of two deaths and now, the death of the husband of the sister of my grandmother. As far as I'm concerned, it was a distant relative but my grandmother, grandfather and dad thought differently. Since I had no excuse not to go with them, I reluctantly joined them this morning at La Paz Sucat (inside Manila Memorial Park).

The Paz building in Sucat is relatively new. I deduced this by just looking at the modern design and the well-kept interior. The lobby looks as if I entered a hotel (complete with the concierge and elevator).

I spent the whole morning sitting there all sleepy and knowing no one except my grandparents and father. Most of the people spoke in Kapampangan which further alienated me (I only know "ditak" of the vernacular). Using the cold as an excuse, I went down to the lobby and ensconced myself on one of the comfy couches there and took a nap. I went back upstairs when the mass was about to start.

It has been a long time ever since I attended an actual burial. Most of the time, I just go to the wake and that's it. The last time that I recall attending a burial was that of my great grandmother. I was 5 that time. I did not even attended the burial of my maternal grandfather who died 11 years ago. I recall one of their "pamahiin" was to pass the kids over the coffin, for whatever purpose, I do not know. I'm glad that they did not observe any "pamahiin" this time.

I thought that since I was a distant relative, I won't be affected by the homily and ceremony following the mass. I was sorely mistaken.

During the priest's homily, I could feel the tears pricking the back of my eyes but I held them valiantly at bay. It was the eulogy given by the only son which made the tears fall and made me sniffle. It was very touching and I could not help but cry.

I wanted to go home after the mass but my grandparents were on their way to the burial site within the Manila Memorial grounds so I had no choice but to follow.

While we were in the car following the funeral procession, I could not help but look at the other tombs in the area. I marveled at the breath-taking mausoleums (e.g. the one near the entrance. The design would remind you of the Parthenon) and at how serene and peaceful everything is. It's really a good place where one can be laid to rest.

The burial plot is located a few meters from the river bed. There was this contraption which would lower the coffin gently down into the earth. The last goodbyes were really tear-jerking, moreover, accompanied by a guy singing with his guitar. He sang bible psalms and his tenor voice made me think of John Denver. The family was crying so much and it took awhile before they were able to say goodbye. They asked that happy birthday be sung because today also happens to be the birthday of the deceased. Of course, there was nothing happy on the way they sang it but it was the thought that counts.

One thing that I'll always remember of this day is what my grandfather said while we were waiting for the mass to start. He mentioned that he wants to be cremated immediately when his time will come. There will still be a wake but instead of a coffin, there's just his ashes and his picture. I just nodded when he said that but I could feel the tears starting again so I just changed the topic. I love my lolo very much, moreover the point that he and I are so much alike. We share the same interests in literature and history (I got my addiction to books from him, as well as my creative writing side). Anyway, I hope that day won't be near in coming. My grandfather's lineage is blessed with long lives. I hope he lives more than a hundred. Heck, his eldest sister is already 103. He has 20 years to go and hopefully by that time, I already have a husband and kids who he can also be proud of.

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