I've been feeling down the past couple of days. I also have a headache that hasn't let up since last night--I don't know if it's due to my eyesight or something else. It's good that there's no work tomorrow. I hope I don't spend most of it crying.
Am so looking forward to my leave in a couple of weeks (starting Nov. 13). I really need some R&R. It's so long overdue.
*sigh* I think I need a new job.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Saturday, October 28, 2006
Light at the end of the Tunnel
Last Wednesday, I had a heart to heart talk with my boss. I poured out my frustrations, anxieties and insecurities about my job. I knew that I had to do something when I did nothing last Tuesday except cry instead of studying for my Digitech midterms. Moreover, I was crying in the shuttle on my way to work! Now if that's not burn out, I don't know waht it is.
When I got to work, I was crying every other minute. When I could not bear it any longer, I asked him if we could talk and we went down to Starbucks and went to a corner where we talked.
We spent around half an hour wherein we dialogued about expectations and my future with the department. Am so glad I managed to get all those things off my chest. It was affecting me in a negative way already. My sanity and my health was at stake already.
On another bright note, two people who are dear to me managed to resolve their decade old "misunderstanding". Am so looking forward to seeing them both on my wedding day together.
Am on block leave starting mid-November. As I needed a break from work, it was one of the things that I asked from my boss which he readily granted. I contacted my high school friends and we're thinking of going off to my bestfriend's province in Laguna for some R&R. Come to think of it, it's our first out of town ever! I'm so looking forward to that.
When I got to work, I was crying every other minute. When I could not bear it any longer, I asked him if we could talk and we went down to Starbucks and went to a corner where we talked.
We spent around half an hour wherein we dialogued about expectations and my future with the department. Am so glad I managed to get all those things off my chest. It was affecting me in a negative way already. My sanity and my health was at stake already.
On another bright note, two people who are dear to me managed to resolve their decade old "misunderstanding". Am so looking forward to seeing them both on my wedding day together.
Am on block leave starting mid-November. As I needed a break from work, it was one of the things that I asked from my boss which he readily granted. I contacted my high school friends and we're thinking of going off to my bestfriend's province in Laguna for some R&R. Come to think of it, it's our first out of town ever! I'm so looking forward to that.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Burn Out
I'm so tired. I haven't been this tired in my whole life. Actually, it's the stress and it's affecting my health already. I've been having problems breathing lately. It's not asthma because am not wheezing (and my gosh, I've been asthmatic half of my life so I know what an asthma attack feels like). It's just that my breathing is so shallow and it hurts when I take a deep breath. I already had an x-ray done but I still haven't gotten the results yet. Preliminary diagnosis is a sore cartilage (in my chest area) and it's usually associated with stress and tiredness.
Today is supposed to be a vacation. No, I'm not at work but I woke up at freaking 4:30 in the morning with thoughts of work in my head. Leo picked me up at 9 am and we had breakfast at Pancake House where I had their bangus breakfast. Afterwhich, we went to South Supermarket where I picked up a few groceries. On our way back to the car, I felt queasy and was finding it difficult to breathe. Morever, the sun was really hurting my eyes. Gosh, I must be turning into a vampire!
I don't know how long I'll last like this. Leo's getting worried for me already and so am I. I cry when I go home from work and I dread going to work the next day. Am in the verge of burnout and I badly need a vacation. Am going to talk to my boss when I get back tomorrow and negotiate for my vacation time. My block leave is initially scheduled on the end of December but I don't think I can wait that long. My sanity and my health is on the line already.
Just last week when I experienced these chest pains, I still had to go to work because my boss was worried--not about me but the work that I might leave behind. He said I should just speak up if I need to go to the hospital. Yeah right. All I need is to freaking rest!
Today is supposed to be a vacation. No, I'm not at work but I woke up at freaking 4:30 in the morning with thoughts of work in my head. Leo picked me up at 9 am and we had breakfast at Pancake House where I had their bangus breakfast. Afterwhich, we went to South Supermarket where I picked up a few groceries. On our way back to the car, I felt queasy and was finding it difficult to breathe. Morever, the sun was really hurting my eyes. Gosh, I must be turning into a vampire!
I don't know how long I'll last like this. Leo's getting worried for me already and so am I. I cry when I go home from work and I dread going to work the next day. Am in the verge of burnout and I badly need a vacation. Am going to talk to my boss when I get back tomorrow and negotiate for my vacation time. My block leave is initially scheduled on the end of December but I don't think I can wait that long. My sanity and my health is on the line already.
Just last week when I experienced these chest pains, I still had to go to work because my boss was worried--not about me but the work that I might leave behind. He said I should just speak up if I need to go to the hospital. Yeah right. All I need is to freaking rest!
Friday, October 20, 2006
Kill the Rooster
Am one of those people who are cursed/blessed to be a light sleeper. As am very stressed nowadays, sleep is a precious commodity which I readily treasure.
For the past two days, the crowing of a rooster manages to cruelly wake me up at 430 in the morning. And to think this rooster is in a vacant lot behind our house which my room unfortunately overlooks. I don't know if this has been happening for quite some time and I only noticed it recently due to my stress, but it has been irritating the hell out of me. I peered out of my window this morning and I saw the rooster teetered beneath a tree. If I had a sumpit or slingshot, I would've taken a shot on that rooster. However, I've already complained to Mamu and hopefully she'll have a talk with our neighbor.
For the past two days, the crowing of a rooster manages to cruelly wake me up at 430 in the morning. And to think this rooster is in a vacant lot behind our house which my room unfortunately overlooks. I don't know if this has been happening for quite some time and I only noticed it recently due to my stress, but it has been irritating the hell out of me. I peered out of my window this morning and I saw the rooster teetered beneath a tree. If I had a sumpit or slingshot, I would've taken a shot on that rooster. However, I've already complained to Mamu and hopefully she'll have a talk with our neighbor.
Monday, October 09, 2006
Name Woes
Leo and I decided that if we have children, we will only be giving the kid(s), one name. I balked at first as I wanted my child to have two names (just like me and my siblings). But I just realized today how complicated it can be.
My birth certificate carries only my first name while my baptismal and confirmation certificates carries my two names. I read in a wedding preparation forum that one couple had their marriage application rejected by their parish because of the name discrepancy in their documents. My option now is to go to my baptismal and confirmation parish to request for a name change on my documents. It's going to be a long tedious process of going back and forth. I plan to do this during my break this year. Hopefully the churches are open to facilitate my requests. Another option suggested to me was to have my name legally changed which would lead to an annotation on my birth certificate. But am not prepared to go through that process.
Now, I have to have ALL my official documents changed to carry just my first name. It's going to be something that I have to get used to.
I fully support my fiance's notion of only giving one first name to our kids. I do not want my children to go through the same complications and legal hassles. Actually, it would not be an issue if my birth certificate was properly filled out and nobody in my family decided to add that second name on my baptismal certificate. But well, it happened and I have to live with the consequences.
My birth certificate carries only my first name while my baptismal and confirmation certificates carries my two names. I read in a wedding preparation forum that one couple had their marriage application rejected by their parish because of the name discrepancy in their documents. My option now is to go to my baptismal and confirmation parish to request for a name change on my documents. It's going to be a long tedious process of going back and forth. I plan to do this during my break this year. Hopefully the churches are open to facilitate my requests. Another option suggested to me was to have my name legally changed which would lead to an annotation on my birth certificate. But am not prepared to go through that process.
Now, I have to have ALL my official documents changed to carry just my first name. It's going to be something that I have to get used to.
I fully support my fiance's notion of only giving one first name to our kids. I do not want my children to go through the same complications and legal hassles. Actually, it would not be an issue if my birth certificate was properly filled out and nobody in my family decided to add that second name on my baptismal certificate. But well, it happened and I have to live with the consequences.
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Stressed backward is Desserts: The Traumatic Misadventures of the Davids
The past two weeks have been a pressure cooker--thus the lack of updates.
Our new boss FINALLY came in last September 15 and ever since he came in, I can never seem to have a slow day at work. There's always something to do EVERYDAY. Don't get me wrong. He's REALLY good and he knows what he's doing. Am very priviledged to work with him and in the past 2 weeks that we've been working together, I've learned a lot as well. He treats me as his right hand and at the same time, he gives me SO many things to do. We meet everyday first thing in the morning and we go through all the stuff that we have to accomplish within the day. It's great to finally have some sort of direction. Although the work that we've been doing means that there are a lot of things that we need to accomplish.
Am sure everyone has been talking about the typhoon "Milenyo" last week which caused widespread devastation across Manila and several provinces with Bicol being the worst hit. Leo's area was declared state of calamity due to the number of trees that fell around their subdivision. There was even this tree that fell but instead of falling on the street, it caught on some wires and was kept upright because of these wires. We had also to endure the inconvenience of no power as electricity was only restored at BF Sunday morning!
Oh and things got more interesting! The misadventure continues!
Last Tuesday around 3 pm, I received a call from my hysterical aunt saying that my sister, Cheryll (the mother of my adorable nephew, Miguel) got into an accident. In between her sobs, she was telling me that my sister fell off the jeepney, hit her head on the cemented road and that she's in the hospital in critical condition. By then, I was also getting worked up and trying hard to stay calm. I called her back on her landline and tried to get the whole story and calming her down as well. I just asked that I be picked up as soon as possible so we could go to the hospital and find out what happened.
My dad (who was also sick) and my brother, picked me up at around 4:30 in the afternoon. We proceeded to Chinese General Hospital and looked for the husband of my sister. We found him lining up to pay for the room of my sister. When he saw us, he started crying. We then went to the Emergency Room where we saw my sister all bruised and battered but fortunately, still conscious and most importantly, still alive. She started crying as well when she saw us. After talking to my brother-in-law and his mom, we finally got the whole story together.
My sister was on her way to Metropolitan Hospital for her 1 pm nursing shift. She was riding a jeepney and seated beside the back entrance of the jeep. When the jeepney was near the La Loma Cemetery area, the guy beside her suddenly announced a robbery and asked for her cellphone. Now, my sister is a very intelligent person and she has proven this by passing not one, but TWO different board exams (dentistry and nursing), but at the instant, she just panicked and jumped out of the moving jeepney. She landed on the road, rolled and eventually bumped her head on the hard ground. She then blacked out. Fortunately, there were no cars trailing the jeepney at that time and a jeepney stopped to take her to the hospital. When she regained consciousness, she was already at the hospital. She still managed to text someone which somehow led us to the information.
The whole thing was a very traumatic experience for all of us. I had to calm down my aunt and my mom who called from the States and was also very worried and frantic. My aunt even brought her own specialist (a family friend) with her to the hospital to assure us that my sister will be fine. My sister had bruises and wounds on her arms, where we assumed took the brunt of her fall from the vehicle. The CT-Scan also revealed a fracture on the occipital area of her skull which will also fortunately heal after 6 weeks. Her temporal lobes were also bruised due to the brain bumping the back of the skull as well as the temporal lobes. There's nothing to worry about neurologically. Her brain is okay and her spine is okay. We just need to take care of her fracture and ensures that she gets her rest. Am just so thankful to God that she's okay and not seriously harmed.
Oh, but the misadventures doesn't stop there.
When I got home last night, my cousin said that my brother, and his family will be sleeping over at BF. That somehow alarmed me and when they arrived sometime midnight, it seems that they're having problems with his wife's family (they live with his wife's family). There was some sort of big blow-out and either they were asked to leave the house or they decided to leave themselves. That was not clear. My aunt offered to take them in until they figure out what to do.
Am just so glad that it's Friday tomorrow. I've already calendared the First Friday Mass here at work so that my boss will know that I will be busy. Please pray for my family. We really need it now.
Our new boss FINALLY came in last September 15 and ever since he came in, I can never seem to have a slow day at work. There's always something to do EVERYDAY. Don't get me wrong. He's REALLY good and he knows what he's doing. Am very priviledged to work with him and in the past 2 weeks that we've been working together, I've learned a lot as well. He treats me as his right hand and at the same time, he gives me SO many things to do. We meet everyday first thing in the morning and we go through all the stuff that we have to accomplish within the day. It's great to finally have some sort of direction. Although the work that we've been doing means that there are a lot of things that we need to accomplish.
Am sure everyone has been talking about the typhoon "Milenyo" last week which caused widespread devastation across Manila and several provinces with Bicol being the worst hit. Leo's area was declared state of calamity due to the number of trees that fell around their subdivision. There was even this tree that fell but instead of falling on the street, it caught on some wires and was kept upright because of these wires. We had also to endure the inconvenience of no power as electricity was only restored at BF Sunday morning!
Oh and things got more interesting! The misadventure continues!
Last Tuesday around 3 pm, I received a call from my hysterical aunt saying that my sister, Cheryll (the mother of my adorable nephew, Miguel) got into an accident. In between her sobs, she was telling me that my sister fell off the jeepney, hit her head on the cemented road and that she's in the hospital in critical condition. By then, I was also getting worked up and trying hard to stay calm. I called her back on her landline and tried to get the whole story and calming her down as well. I just asked that I be picked up as soon as possible so we could go to the hospital and find out what happened.
My dad (who was also sick) and my brother, picked me up at around 4:30 in the afternoon. We proceeded to Chinese General Hospital and looked for the husband of my sister. We found him lining up to pay for the room of my sister. When he saw us, he started crying. We then went to the Emergency Room where we saw my sister all bruised and battered but fortunately, still conscious and most importantly, still alive. She started crying as well when she saw us. After talking to my brother-in-law and his mom, we finally got the whole story together.
My sister was on her way to Metropolitan Hospital for her 1 pm nursing shift. She was riding a jeepney and seated beside the back entrance of the jeep. When the jeepney was near the La Loma Cemetery area, the guy beside her suddenly announced a robbery and asked for her cellphone. Now, my sister is a very intelligent person and she has proven this by passing not one, but TWO different board exams (dentistry and nursing), but at the instant, she just panicked and jumped out of the moving jeepney. She landed on the road, rolled and eventually bumped her head on the hard ground. She then blacked out. Fortunately, there were no cars trailing the jeepney at that time and a jeepney stopped to take her to the hospital. When she regained consciousness, she was already at the hospital. She still managed to text someone which somehow led us to the information.
The whole thing was a very traumatic experience for all of us. I had to calm down my aunt and my mom who called from the States and was also very worried and frantic. My aunt even brought her own specialist (a family friend) with her to the hospital to assure us that my sister will be fine. My sister had bruises and wounds on her arms, where we assumed took the brunt of her fall from the vehicle. The CT-Scan also revealed a fracture on the occipital area of her skull which will also fortunately heal after 6 weeks. Her temporal lobes were also bruised due to the brain bumping the back of the skull as well as the temporal lobes. There's nothing to worry about neurologically. Her brain is okay and her spine is okay. We just need to take care of her fracture and ensures that she gets her rest. Am just so thankful to God that she's okay and not seriously harmed.
Oh, but the misadventures doesn't stop there.
When I got home last night, my cousin said that my brother, and his family will be sleeping over at BF. That somehow alarmed me and when they arrived sometime midnight, it seems that they're having problems with his wife's family (they live with his wife's family). There was some sort of big blow-out and either they were asked to leave the house or they decided to leave themselves. That was not clear. My aunt offered to take them in until they figure out what to do.
Am just so glad that it's Friday tomorrow. I've already calendared the First Friday Mass here at work so that my boss will know that I will be busy. Please pray for my family. We really need it now.
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