Goodbye, My Captain

O Captain! My Captain!

BY WALT WHITMAN

O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,

The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won,

The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,

While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;

                         But O heart! heart! heart!

                            O the bleeding drops of red,

                               Where on the deck my Captain lies,

                                  Fallen cold and dead.

O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;

Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills,

For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding,

For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;

                         Here Captain! dear father!

                            The arm beneath your head!

                               It is some dream that on the deck,

                                 You’ve fallen cold and dead.

My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,

My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will,

The ship is anchor’d safe and sound, its voyage closed and done,

From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;

                         Exult O shores, and ring O bells!

                            But I with mournful tread,

                               Walk the deck my Captain lies,

                                  Fallen cold and dead.

(Taken from http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/174742)

I first heard about Robin Williams' passing while listening to my favorite morning radio show, The Morning Rush. I initially thought it was Robbie Williams but before I could hear more, I lost the radio signal as I was underground. When I got to my workstation, I immediately started a google search. When no mention about Robbie Williams, I searched for Robin Williams. I could only sit there in shock while my mind went into #TBT mode.

Robin Williams played a big part in my teenage life. Dead Poets Society was the favorite movie of my high school barkada. In fact, we named our barkada after it. There's something about seizing the day that made us relate to the characters in the show. 

The poem above was our chorale recitation piece after hearing it at the DPS movie. I could still remember the feeling of grief which we internalized when we recited the poem. I felt the same grief when I first heard the news and I'm still reeling from it, 14 hours later.

As I write this entry, I'm watching Youtube clips of different Robin Williams interviews. I can't believe that a man who made others happy is battling horrible sadness that eventually took his life.

My Captain has fallen cold and dead but his memory will continue to live on with every laughter.

RIP, Robin Williams (1951-2014). You are now truly free.