Stress Galore

Sometimes I wonder why I put up with up.

It has been a wringer of a week and my head has been aching non-stop due to the stress.

First of all, one of my top performer staff who was transferred to another department early this month is tendering his resignation tomorrow. I already got wind of it yesterday and asked him if we could talk. I helped him weigh the pros and the cons and I've told him of my plans for him. Apparently, he places more importance to the money and has no patience to wait for my plans to unravel. I already had my boss speak with him and HR as well. But it seems that he has made up his mind. I am so very disappointed because I have so much plans for him and his career growth. We could only shake our heads and say "sayang" (I can't counter-offer or give him a promotion as I just promoted him last April. Salary increase is also not justifiable due to the current promotion).

Second, my boss, an expat and one of the company's country managers has tendered his resignation effective tomorrow. The business head announced it to us just this morning. We're a bit shocked though we've expected it but not this soon. Though there are times that we don't see eye to eye on some policies, personally he's really a good person. We had a heart-to-heart talk this afternoon and I couldn't ask him how he felt because I was close to tears already. I asked him if he was relieved and he said he could not answer me because it's different at his level. I just looked down and changed the topic. Somehow, I could feel his pain on having to give his resignation during the most trying times of our business. He did not deserve that as what happened was not his pure fault. A lot of people are to blame and I hope that the others involved will just up and leave as well. I'm sure Group will have a field day and the Bosses and Powers-That-Be will surely descend on us and pick at us one by one until we've got nothing left to give.

My boss then turned the conversation and asked me how I am and I almost cried. I just laughed and said I'm surviving and ok--as of now. In my 8 years with this company, I've been a witness to its highs and lows and this is definitely a big low. Having existed in the country for 130 or so years, I know we will survive this crisis and many more. I just hope that we will survive with our sanity intact. As my boss said (and to paraphrase Nietsze too), if this does not kill me, it will make me stronger.

I attended a training yesterday on coaching (Great Managers Training). Our speaker was one of the Manco members and is the head of a successful business (Yes, Joelle, you know him). He said that the problem with our business is due to poor leadership and I heartily agreed with him. We've already had 5 or 6 business heads in the past 10 years and all of them have different directions and plans. I then asked him if he's willing to take on the business if the CEO asks him. He just laughed and said he doesn't have any experience. I then said that that was the same thing he said when he was offered to head the business that he's currently managing. I mean who knows, we just need that extraordinary person to turn the business around and give us the inspiration to get things going. Everyone is already tired and God knows we need something to help us through this.

Wala lang. Napapagod na ako. I was supposed to go to Singapore pa mid-September but can't travel in my current condition. Sayang. Wanted to go and eat at Pepper Rice again at Suntek Plaza.

Hay naku, I really don't know where we will end up. With the different problems cropping up and the CBA deadlock, I really...don't....know. Lord, give me strength.