With the duration of my mom's stay here in Manila, she demanded that we leave our Sundays free for us to have lunch together. This was the second Sunday wherein we were able to eat lunch at the same time. It was a touching moment except the time when they started planning the weddings.
My brother is having his church wedding December next year while my two other sisters will be having a double wedding January of 2005. While they were doing all the planning and talking, all I wanted to do was slink away. All the wedding talk made me come face to face with what I do not have.
I am perceived as a person who's good at what she does at work and would no doubt, succeed. I am perceived as someone who chose this path. Someone who chose her career over having a family or love. I wish it was that. I chose this path because this is what is laid out for me. However, in my heart, all I want is to have a family and live a simple life. That is all I want in life, but I will be damned if I will marry the next available guy. I don't want to make myself more miserable than I already am.
Nevertheless, I take this path with eyes open and with great hope that I will still have what I want in life. But if that is not God's will, then I will just pray for strength to accept what is given to me. Moreover, having the strength to survive those upcoming weddings. I'm sure I will have to contend with the questions and pitying looks that I will get knowing that I'm the only unmarried sibling left.
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