Saturday, May 15, 2004

Sick Day

Called in sick yesterday. I've been looking forward to spending the whole day at home and channel surfing but I ended up being bored to death. There was absolutely nothing to watch on TV and I find getting up to find a decent DVD to watch painful (or I'm just plain lazy). My heel was still hurting yesterday I decided to give it a rest. I succumbed today and took one of the pain relievers that my doctor prescribed. I hate them pills. I don't want to be dependent on them. Heck, I don't want to be dependent on any medicine. Even if I'm suffering from an asthma attack, I try to bear it hoping it would go away (which it does, most of the time). But when it's already bothering me, that's when I use my inhaler.

Something about these inhalers made me think about that Stephen King movie (I think the title is "It"). Where these kids were being chased inside a cave and one of them was an asthmatic. He had his inhaler in his hand and was inhaling like crazy. Hopefully, my kids (if ever I have them), won't become an asthma like me ("Hi, my name is Sunshine and I'm an asthmatic).

Home is also not the way it used to be. I guess things already changed. There was a time when this house was so full but now, it feels so empty. I know how my dad feels now. My two sisters are living with their husbands in Quezon City (most of the time) which leaves me, my brother and his spouse and my dad. That's still company, but it feels different. My two sisters are usually the animated ones. They bring colour to our family. But i guess we've grown up now. Time will come when I will also be leaving the house, either to get married or just move out on my own.

Speaking of getting married, I had a chat with a friend the other night when I was feeling so down. We talked about weddings and stuff and we laughed when I told her that I already have a wedding dress in mind (as if I'm getting married soon. But well, girls should be prepared for things like these). When I was in my teens, I never even thought of boys, weddings and what have you. Heck, not even in college or after that. Yes, I received a proposal and accepted, but it was nothing solid like this. I actually have a wedding gown in mind already! Mind you, it's a very difficult decision since my body type is not one which can readily accomodate any design from the modelling runway. I'm FAT. Thankfully not obese but FAT. Either I kill myself trying to get thin just to fit into a size 8 dress, or I think of a dress which would fit my body type. I chose the latter. I can be fit and pretty! Sa pagdadala lang naman yan eh. Hopefully my insecurities won't get the best of me.

Anyway, enough of that. I'll discuss wedding dresses when/if I get my proposal.

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