Love According to Neil Gaiman

It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your
heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build
up all these defenses. You build up this whole armor, for years, so
nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other
stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...you give them a piece of
you. They don't ask for it. They do something dumb one day like kiss
you or smile at you and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes
hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in
the darkness, so a simple phrase like "maybe we should just be friends"
or "how very perceptive" turns into a glass splinter working its way
into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the
mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets inside you and rips you
apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love.

From Sandman:The Kindly Ones, Neil Gaiman.

The above quote came from one of Neil Gaiman's books. I've forgotten
who forwarded it to me but when I read it, it somehow struck a chord.

Where am I?

I was lucky to have a good seat in the shuttle this morning. I had a
place where I can rest my head so that I can catch up on sleep on my
way to work. So I plugged in my earphones and let the music lull me to
sleep.

After a few minutes, a girl in an exclusive girls' school uniform got
in and sat beside me. I blinked at her and went back to sleep. A few
minutes later, the door opened and I suddenly heard people giggling. I
opened my eyes and the two girls apparently know each other and they
started giggling and laughing. I thought it will just be a momentary
thing but they were giggling and laughing throughout the 30 minute
trip. The bad thing was, I could hear them through my earphones (and
my music was loud) and one of the girls was seating beside me and she
kept on jostling me whenever she would laugh or giggle. I wanted to
tell them to shut up and the "nice" side of me kept on telling me that
they are just girls. I then started to think when I was when I was
their age. I realized than I must've been laughing and giggling as
well if I saw an old friend. I must've been caught up with the
intricacies of life that I've forgotten what it feels to be carefree.
I suddenly felt so OLD!

My Summer Memories

I got the idea for this post from my friend Cessna's blog. She said she's not particularly fond of wet markets and depends on SM supermarket for her wet market needs. However, I guess I'm the opposite.

No, I don't make it a hobby of trudging or visiting all the wet markets around the Metro. I guess I just have good memories of those places. When we were kids, particularly around the elementary age, my parents would send us to the province to spent the summer. My aunt or grandmother would go to the wet market everyday to buy fresh meat, fish or vegetables to serve for lunch and dinner. I would gladly accompany her. I don't know why but I find myself fascinated whenever she would buy live catfish and have the vendor clean and chop it for her. Hmmm...that speaks volumes of my personality. Must be some Freudian thing. But, the best thing about the wet market in the province is when we would stop by the sweets store. Note that a provincial sweets/chichiria store rarely sell those imported candies. They sell the locally made ones and they're not even branded. I forgot what some of them are called but I love this small round yellow sweet thing. It's like a cookie but it's too soft. Also there's a sweet candy called "tira-tira". It's basically brown sugar molded into sticks. And the local cheese curls. I forgot the brand but they're sold in little packets and you can buy them in bulk (like 20-30 pcs in one big plastic).

My best memory of our summer is when our ice cream "suki" would pass by. We call him "lapit-suki". I innocently thought that it was his name but apparently, it's just something that he keeps saying again and again and my aunts just call him that. Anyway, he sold really creamy ice cream. It's so good that instead of buying a cone, we'd bring out our glasses and have him fill those up. And during fiestas or any celebration, my lolo would buy one whole can of ice cream (his favourite is langka. mmmmm...yummy). The can is not the ordinary 1 kl can you can buy in the supermarket. It's the long silver one. I don't know how much ice cream that holds but it can certainly feed all of us.

Actually, it's not only summer that we get to go to the province. My maternal grandparents and relatives have a big house in the province. Big enough for their brood of 13--most of them married. So every weekend, or every summer, we would get picked up and my siblings and I would join some cousins for a nice short/long vacation. As there were so many of us, we would never get bored or find nothing to do. We have relatives all around Batangas so we'd take trips to visit them, and we'd bring back food in the process. We would bring back a kaing of lanzones and eat them in front of the TV. My grandparents also owned a betamax rental then, so we'd bring home the latest movie (Night of the Living Dead--that certainly caused me some sleepless nights there. It did not help that the room that I shared with my relatives overlooked a wide expanse of lawn and I was calculating the distance of the house from the cemetery) and watch it while eating green mangoes (either with bagoong or with my favourite dip--soy sauce with sugar!). The house also has two bathtubs and we'd fill up one and soak in it with our cousins.

That big house really holds wonderful memories of my childhood. Too bad it's not the same as it was before. Everything changed when my grandfather died fifteen years ago. Though my grandmother is still alive, her health began to deterioriate after his death. She's based in the US now and she'll probably stay there for good. She doesn't have the strength or stamina to endure the long travel back home.

I remember my relatives and I would be sitting at the marble front steps in the late afternoon or early evening with my grandparents. We'd play games or hold contests there to amuse ourselves (cable was non-existent back then). The front lawn was so wide that we can play tag or any outdoor game imaginable with lots of room to spare. I'd lose out on "monkey-monkey" (I was not a very good runner), but I loved the "luksong tinik" or "piko".

It was in the province that I learned to do household chores. My grandfather did not tolerate slackers and he ran a tight ship. He would have us cleaning the house, the garden and there was even a time, had us help with the slaughtering of the chickens (they had a poultry farm at the back of the house, beside a small piggery). He did not exactly had us do the killing, but we had the distasteful task of dipping the chickens in boiling water and pulling out the feathers. Aaaaaaahhhh!!! I must have a strong stomach because am still eating chicken up to now.

As we did not have any nannies back then, we had to do our own laundry and make our own beds. My siblings and I would wash our clothes by hand at the back of the house. I did not worst job of all compared to my sisters. They would patiently scrub or make "kusot" their clothes while I, taking the easy way out, would stomp on them, mimicking the washerwomen at the small river nearby with their "pamalo".

Those were the days indeed. I wish my future children would have the same experiences that I had. It has certainly helped me in more ways than one.

Virus Free

Apologies to my friends/relatives who supposedly received email from me containing attachments with virus. I don't think there's anything wrong with my office computer. I know I did not download anything last Thursday and the anomaly started when I used a computer at an internet cafe. I don't know though why the originating address is my office email address though. It's so disconcerting.

Nothing noteworthy happened much this week. My sister passed her interview and she's leaving on Tuesday. We're having a despedida for her tonight. My whole family is staying at BF tonight until tomorrow. There are plans going to Tagaytay tomorrow although I don't know if that would push through. We don't know where were going to go there. Unless we end up again having a picnic at People's Park.

Happy Father's Day

Visited my Lolo and my Dad last Sunday at Makati. I was very worried about my lolo. His recent check-up showed that he has an enlarged heart and with hypertension. Surgery is an option but he refused as he said he's old already and he's ready to go. Am glad though that he enjoyed the shirt I gave him. He's so proud of his roots that he was very delighted with the shirt that says "Proudly Kapampangan". I hope I can get him more stuff that can give him joy. He deserves to be happy.

It was also nice seeing my dad. I gave him his favourite pastry sweet and he was likewise happy to see me. My brother also arrived with his family and my niece has grown. She's walking now and she has gained weight.

Leo and I left after lunch to catch "The Lakehouse" at Greenbelt 3. The film's ok, though there are some parts where it's dragging, but still ok.

New Job

My new job is getting more interesting, meetings aside. My boss was right in saying that there won't be any meeting wherein I'm not invited. In fact, not a day goes by when I'm not in some meeting. The more high-level the meeting, the longer it usually lasts. My meeting yesterday started at 330 pm and when I left at 630 pm, they were still at it. There are times when I'd just zone out, but most of the time, they talk about interesting stuff. I get to see the business at macro-level which made me appreciate my job and the business more. Am definitely taking this job more seriously.

Moreover, I'll be doing audit and spot checks. Am going to visit the branches (hmmm...wonder if they'll send me to Cebu) and agencies. It will not doubt, be very interesting. Some say that it's a very stressful and dirty job but as of now, I'm enjoying it.

Cute na cute na Miguel

My twin sister, in preparation for her departure, has been making scrapbooks featuring pictures of her friends and family. This picture was taken last week while she was playing with our nephew, Miguel. He is such an adorable baby. Miguel Lorenzo is now 4 months old. Seems my siblings have been very prolific in producing such adorable babies. I remembered going gaga over my niece, Chloe, a few months back.

Here is another picture. I asked my twin sister to have these photos printed out and to give me a copy. I'll no doubt, be showing the pics to anyone who has the misfortune of being in my area of influence :) When the pictures were sent to my office email, I showed all my departmates and even my former departmates. One even wanted to make it her wallpaper as one can forget his/her worries just by looking at the pictures.

Consultation

I went to my doctor today, after 4 months of not seeing her. No, I did not have my forgetfulness checked, I went to see my OB. I got the results of my sonomogram (?) taken last January. Of course it was negative for any lumps but at least I have the proof now. She also berated me for not taking the blood tests that she initially asked me to take. It was quite a battery of tests. CBC, glucose, even that thing with the folic acid and german measles thing (to get myself ready for child-bearing). No, I don't intend to get pregnant soon but if our plans will push through, it might be sooner than most people think (cross fingers!). She wants me to get those tests done so she'll know what kind of medication she can give me (I do have Polycystic Ovaries). She's also asking me to take Multivitamins and Calcium, and take note, not just ordinary Multivitamins and Calcium. I was instructed to buy these vitamins only at PriceSmart as those vitamins are like Centrum but very much cheaper (Centrum is P8/tablet while the MV at PS is P.50/tablet). Apparently, I have to take MV with at least 400mcg of folic acid. (Hey friends, please tell me if you're a member of PS. Please buy those MV's for me!) :) In the meantime, I'm going to continue on with my current medication until am ready to get pregnant. Afterwhich, she'll switch me to that medicine which diabetics also take (forgot what it's called) or she'll give me fertility pills--again, depending on the results of my bloodtest.

I had a nice workout at the gym today. FF+ has this new machine called "The Wave". I like it very much as it really makes me sweat without making it hurt too much. A 20 minute workout can make me lose 120-150 calories. What makes it more enjoyable is that there's an LCD screen on it wherein you can choose your own TV station to watch. Unfortunately, FF+'s cable service provider has limited channels. Wonder if the regular FF centers have this machine. Am considering upgrading my membership to have access to other regular FF centers (passport membership?).

Oh yeah, posted some new pics at my fotopage site. Posted pictures of my niece's birthday party. See my very cute niece and nephew.

 

Memory Lapse

Ok, am a bit alarmed how forgetful I have become. I thought it was just a mere case of forgetfulness but today's episode just made me sit back and think about it. It's ok if I just forgot where I put a certain object, but the recent cases involved money and it's something that I cannot afford to forget.

After my gym session early this evening, I bought a medium sized fresh mango shake at the stand outside the gym. I saw an MBA friend and we talked for a few minutes, then I went back to the office to fix my stuff and then I went to the shuttle station. When I was going to pay my fare, I could not remember, for the life of me, whether I paid for my mango shake. I surmised that I must've paid for it, otherwise, the vendor would've called my attention. But I really could not remember how much I paid and what bills I used. Heck, just last week when I boarded the shuttle going to work, I could not remember whether the dispatcher gave me my change. And that was when I sat down on my seat on the shuttle! Less than a minute AFTER he handed me my change. I had to check my wallet whether there's a 5 peso coin there!

I don't know what is causing these memory lapses. I read somewhere that lack of sleep can contribute to short term memory loss, but I know am getting enough sleep! Recalling names and events are becoming more difficult now and I have to think twice before I say something. What should I do?!

Sleeping Monster

The long weekend was a time for me to relax and basically catch up on my sleep. I had a hard time waking up before 7 last Saturday as Leo was picking me up at 730. I managed to muster enough strength to get ready and pack my DVD's and laptop. Leo arrived quarter to 8, we had breakfast at McDonald's and we went to their house. He immediately went to his room to sleep while I ensconced myself in their den where I spent the next 8 hours watching TV and DVD. By the time Leo came down at 5 pm, we were ready to go to church to hear anticipated mass. We went back to their house where I caught Iron Chef America (we don't have Lifestyle channel at BF) and he took me home at 1030 pm.

I immediately went to sleep when Leo took me home Saturday night. When I woke up Sunday, I checked and saw that I slept for more than 7 hours. It's been a long time since I slept that long. Leo picked me up at around lunch time and we proceeded to Greenbelt 3 where we watched Cars (which incidentally, is very good!). After the more than 2 hour movie, we walked around Greenbelt, had dinner at Masas and returned to BF at around 7 pm. We again watched TV until he went home at 10 pm. Again, I promptly fell asleep when he left.

I woke up at 7 am the next day, Monday, with my vivid dream still fresh in my mind. I had a hard time shaking of the sleep and I went over my dream. I dreamed that I went to Puerto Galera with my family together with Leo. Funny thing is, the place did not look like Puerto Galera. The coastline looked like a European coastline (think England or Scotland), and it was cold too! But in my dream, it said that the place was Puerto Galera. Anyway, we had a grand time etc. etc. until it was time to go home and then I woke up. After a few minutes, I fell asleep again and the dream continued, this time, going from good to bad. In my dream, I could not find my bags and Leo was missing as well. I went around Puerto Galera in a jeepney looking for him (and he's not answering his cellphone). I got a call from my mom that they're boarding the boat. So I went to the pier where I saw the boat leaving. Next thing I knew, I was on the boat myself with Leo and my bags not in sight. I woke up again with a headache and somewhat scared that I indeed lost Leo.

Leo picked me up at around 10 am where we again went to his house to have lunch and watch more DVD's. I fell asleep around 2 pm and woke up an hour later with a nagging headache. I guess I slept too much. I don't like sleeping that long.

Now, it's back to work for us. And I found out that am invited to attend a dinner at the CEO's residence next week. Gosh, I have to practice my social skills now (groan).

Hope this works!

There are two internet cafes which I frequent near my house. The first one is more convenient as it's near the tricycle depot where I could a trike which would bring me home. However, for the past two times that I've been here, I could not connect to my blog. So I went to another cafe which is nearer to my house but it's too out of the way and the keyboards there are "sticky"(attributed to it's majority clientele who play all those multi-player/lan games). As am carrying a heavy bag tonight (long weekend and all. Did not want to leave my gym bag in the office. Heard that a lot of people have lost stuff in the office lately), I opted to go to the cafe nearer to the tricycle terminal. I just hope the blogger thing works now.

Nothing much I can talk about except work. The meetings that I've been attending lately are quite interesting and FINALLY, IT managed to transfer my files to my new pc. I can access my archive, address book and files now. However, I forgot to request for printer access. Guess that's another request that I have to make. Oh, I learned a couple of days ago that my boss is RESIGNING. Yes, after he interviewed me for my current post, he resigned and with me barely a week in the job. It's a long complicated story and I felt so lost. I thought I got a good deal when I transferred to my new department and I hope I do not regret it.

Just learned yesterday that my sister will be leaving on the 24th. Ambilis! Her interview will be on the 19th and she's leaving 5 days after. She'll be going out of town with my aunt this weekend to go on a dive with her friends and next week, it'll be a family despedida for her--again, out of town. Gosh, I will SORELY miss her. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I'll miss her!

Almost...

Ok, that was embarassing. Figured out that the email post from my office won't work at all as it will also post the disclaimer indicating my company name at the bottom. I hurriedly left the office (all the internet stations at the office were not working) and went to school to check. Good thing it's working (albeit a bit slow).

Sit Down

It's been quite an uneventful day.

Nothing eventful. Again, no meetings scheduled. However, I spent the whole day in front of an internet workstation. My boss asked me to do some things and I needed internet access to do those things. Forgot how tiring it can be to sit in front of the computer the whole day. I don't know whether I'd prefer the long meetings or sitting at my workstation. One thing's for sure, both activities requires long bouts of sitting.

Leo visited me last night before he went to work. We had dinner at Shakey's and returned home to watch TV. Still feeling down, it was no surprise that I burst into tears while he was hugging me. He was alarmed that I was crying and he wanted to know why. Funny thing was, I could not explain it. I can't totally say that I'm not happy with my work. It's just that I'm still adjusting and as I said in a previous post, I've been missing a lot. Maybe that's why I felt so sad. It's the fourth day in a row that I ate lunch by myself because my schedule with my friends would not jive. Moreover, I learned that my boss just submitted his resignation. I don't know whether I should panic or ignore it. I guess I just have to wait and see what will happen.

Yahoo! It worked!

Yahoo! It worked! I guess this means I can post from my workstation! Hah! No internet access needed! Hahaha! Ahem, ahem. Now I can post my angst without having to look for an internet workstation. Muwahaha! Now if I can just load pictures through email.

 

It's one of those days when you woke up really depressed because of a bad dream. That was what I felt when I went to work this morning. It was a slow day and there were no meetings scheduled. So I spent most of it on my very cold workstation. Looking for something to do, my colleague gave me a cd containing a 1000 page manual of our department (including appendices). At least it'll give me an idea on how to proceed. Am only half done with it and to think I only skimmed! Tomorrow, there will be reports submitted and I have to go through those.

 

 

 

Late Bloomer

For years, I've been trying to figure out how to post from email to blog. Hopefully, this works!

While waiting...

1. Initials:
** CSPD

2. Name someone with the same birthday as
yours?
** my twin sister, her bestfriend from gradeschool, and a friend from SFC

3.Last thing that you ate?
** cheese waffle with bacon strips at Pancake House

4. For or against same sex marriage?
** hmmm...pass

5. Do you still watch cartoons on Saturday?
** yup. kahit hindi saturday, basta palabas yung favourite cartoons ko.

6. Do you believe in God?
** YES

7. Something non-physical you like about yourself:
** maturity (?!)

what i don't?
** not wise enough

8. What is your crush's name?
** piolo and taylor!!!

10. If you could go anywhere in the world, where
would you go?
** europe

11. Favorite holiday?
** halloween

12. Do you download music?
** yup

13. Happy right now?
** yes

14. Has anyone ever sang or played for you?
** Yes

15. Have you ever cried for a reason?
** yup

16. Do you like President Arroyo?
** no

17. Have you ever bungee jumped?
** no

18. Has anyone ten years older than you ever hit on you?
** yes

19. How is the weather right now?
** hot

20. Do you love someone right now?
** yes

21. What is your current favorite song?
** levon (taylor hicks/elton john) and do i make you proud (taylor hicks)

22. What was the last movie you watched?
** x-men iii

23. Do you wear contacts?
** yes...for the last 16 years

24. Where was the last place you went besides your house?
** pancake house

25. What are you afraid of the most?
** failure

26. Any pets?
** none

27. Have you ever loved someone?
** of course

28. What really turns you on?
** intelligence, thoughtfulness, being a boy scout

29. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
** caramel frap lite

30. Have you ever fired a gun?
** no

31. Are you missing someone?
** yes, my friends

32. Do you have an iPod?
** yes (shuffle)

33. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?
** yes. kc concepcion (have no idea, must be the cheekbones)and cherry pie picache (see bridal shower)

34. What's the name of your crush?
** si piolo and si taylor!

35. Are you comfortable with your height?
** yes

36. Have you ever been caught doing something you weren't supposed to be doing?
** i can't remember

38. Butter, plain, kettle, or salted popcorn?
** kettle

39. What books are you reading right now?
** pugad baboy and the undead series

40. Has anyone you were really close to passed away?
** none

41. Do you watch MTV?
** sometimes

42. What's something that really annoys you?
** inconsiderate people

43. What are some things you really like?
** being with my boyfriend

44. Do you like Michael Jackson?
** yes during his "thriller" days (we owned the vinyl record and always played it)

46. Favorite football team?
** don't watch football but i liked "the replacements". you know, the movie with keanu reeds in a football team?

47. Favorite breakfast food?
** hmmm...tusilog (tuyo, sinangang and egg) or tosilog (tocino, sinangag and egg)

48. What u really wanna buy lately?
** a piece of land :)

49. What do you wanna tell him?
** i love you leo!

50. anong gusto mong isigaw ngayon kung
sakaling nasa taas ka ng bundok?
** i love you leo!

Lonely at the Top

I just proved that the adage that "it's lonely at the top" is true. From the 5th floor, I moved to the 10th floor and the environment there is really different. It's more quiet compared to the noise at the 5th floor (if the department beside your cubicle is collections AND at the really delinquent bucket, it can get REALLY noisy). In fact, whenever my cellphone would go off, I would cringe at the noise it would make. Compared to the time when I was in the 5th floor when I would put my cellphone volume on high to just hear it above the din. Also, it's seldom that they play music at the 10th floor. Three VP's are located in the floor/wing that am occupying and they're not really keen on noise. Moreover, the department where I've recently relocated is just outside the head of our business.

It can also get quite lonely. I miss having someone to talk to as my colleagues are rarely in their workstations. Most of the time we would be out in meetings all throughout the building. My cellphone gets quite a workout nowadays as it's the only way we can get in touch with each other (my boss would call and would ask me to attend this meeting etc etc). A couple of times, I had to eat lunch by myself as my schedule is quite irregular. Like last Thursday, my first day in the job, I was supposed to have lunch with a friend at 1130 but my boss suddenly called and asked us to attend a meeting. So I had to cancel instead of having my friend wait for me and good thing because the meeting ended at 130. Last Friday, I ate lunch where my former department is located. My workstation there is still vacant and I welcome the noise. All the silence at the 10th floor was getting into my nerves. Yes, it enables me too work (if you have to read lots of documents and comment on them, you have to really concentrate) but sometimes, it's just too much!

My workstation has its plus factors though. I was given a digital phone with caller ID (thank GOD for caller ID!!!) and it's located near the water station/pantry area! Yahoo!!! Easy access to water and food! Moreover, it's really cold. So I can wear my corporate attire without worrying whether I'm going to sweat through them throughout the day (it's really hot at the 5th floor. Not surprising as the 5th floor is packed with people!).

But who am I complain? I'm blessed with this new job and I find it interesting. I'm learning a lot each day and I'm appreciating my company and the business more. I still miss the people I used to work with, but I was given this opportunity and I have to make the most out of it.

Updates

Finally! I get to post something. It's been an interesting couple of weeks :)

===================

Taylor Hicks, is the new American Idol and I have never been so happy over a darn reality show. I first saw Taylor in the Las Vegas audition leg and he has been our favourite. It was his harmonica playing and the way he sings that really got to me. Especially when he sang his first song (Levon), I've never stopped believing that he could win--and he did.

Taylor defied the odds and amazingly, he never landed in the bottom 2 or bottom 3. That itself shows how much endearing he can be. Though I doubt he can get the teenager vote, but his voice definitely has soul. I'll definitely get his new single (I think it'll be out in June). I like him better than Carrie Underwood!

Speaking of celebrations, I have another reason to celebrate. Effective June 1, I'll be moving to a new position within the company (at a higher rank). Am very excited about it as it will entail different responsibilities and tasks. The job scope will be wider and I will be dealing with middle and top management people. Of course, there's trepidation as this will definitely be out of my comfort zone but the higher-ups are confident that I can do that job. If ever I do this right, there's another promotion waiting for me by the most, April next year. Gosh, I never dreamed that I will be climbing the corporate ladder and here I am, climbing it one rung at a time.

I have to practice my english and my grammar though (hopefully, it would translate to more blog posts) as most of my new work would entail correspondence and dealing with people across the business. Oh, and I also have to watch my p's and f's as I will be dealing with people from other countries as well. Gosh, am so excited! There will also be training and most of it will be out of the country! Wow, I get to use my passport. I haven't used it since 1987! How pathetic is that?!

Leo's on shifting again. I try not to complain much about his schedule (after all, he's doing this for us and our future etc etc) but it just plain sucks! For the month of May, he was on shifting from 4 pm to 1 am (European shift) and for the month of June, he'll be on shift from 12am to 9 am (10 pm to 7 am on days when he has classes). I miss him already :( At least I have this new job which will keep me preoccupied.

Speaking of class, I filed for residency for this term. As I thought that I will be moving to a new company, I went on leave as to concentrate on my new job. As it is, I really do need the leave as I'll be moving to another department/position. I've also started to get used to wearing make-up everyday. Now that, I really need to master. People have already remarked how more "fresh-looking" I look with the make-up and all. As I'll be in the floor where our HR is and where the head of the business is, I have to make myself presentable (as in corporate attire!). I went shopping for new clothes this weekend. I never realized how darned expensive blazers and nice looking clothes can be! I did find a shop (The Black Shop) where I got this nice black blouse with pearl buttons and matching black slacks! The fit's really nice and am looking forward to buying more stuff from them. I can't make it often though as their prices are really steep (compared to SM/Landmark of course). I bought a suit/skirt from SM at half the price of the slacks from The Black Shop!

Thanks to the Official Soul Patrol Website for the picture.