LSS

Darn this last song syndrome! Maroon 5's song is now permanently lodged in the videoke part of my brain, together with MYMP's "A Little Bit". Oh yeah, would recommend 94.7 during early afternoon (12 to 2 pm). They play acoustic hits during that time, and I'm not talking about the usual accoustic singers. I heard Nickelback's song today. Was surprised since I only hear their song in SO's radio station (NU 107).

Anyway, it's been days since my last post. I've been busy since Sunday. Leo and I were down south last Sunday and when I came home, I finished the last of my Ethics report and my genogram assignment.

As for Monday, I met with my groupmates to finalize our report. And yesterday, we had our group presentation. So far, the feedback was great and we got a nice applause for our efforts (even if our report took the whole 3 hour period!). And to think there were only three of us in the group.

CONJUGAL PROPERTY

There was a short, albeit, heated discussion at work last week about conjugal property. It started when SO made a statement regarding conjugal property. Anyway, I asked around and this is basically what I learned:

1. Anything that a person owns before marriage will be considered part of the conjugal property. Property, land titles and other chattel usually fall under this category. Income earned and debts incurred before and during the marriage will also be part of the conjugal pool. Jewelry, believe it or not, is also considered conjugal (although I doubt a husband would want to wear his wife's bling-blings or earrings).

2. If you're married, even if you have a bank account only under your name, the money there will be considered conjugal property and your spouse will have legal rights to that account.

3. There are property and assets which can be exempt from this ruling. For one, if the aforementioned property/assets were inherited, donated or given to the person. Inheritance or lotto/lottery winnings are not conjugal.

4. The existence of a pre-nuptial agreement is for the purpose of limiting the application of the conjugal law. A pre-nup can dictate which assets can only be considered as part of the conjugal pool. It can also have a clause in cases if the couple will separate--that sort of thing--which leads to the thought that if one part asks the other party to sign a pre-nup, they automatically presume that they will separate and that one is only with the other for his/her money. I can be wrong in this and I'm not claiming total authority. Any correction will be welcome.

DEAR ATE SUNSHINE

I played "Dear Ate Sunshine" to a good friend tonight. We had dinner at a nearby Pancake House and I spent more than an hour or so listening to his woes and his over-rationalization. I didn't mind though. It's been a long time since we've talked and I would want him to find the same happiness that I share with my SO right now. If listening and giving him the female's point of view is the only thing I can do for him, then I'll glady do so.

On second thought, I can always play matchmaker. MATCHMAKER ATE SUNSHINE CALLING ALL MY SINGLE GIRL-FRIENDS OUT THERE (OR SINGLE FRIENDS OF MY GIRL-FRIENDS), IF ANYONE WANTS TO DATE A REALLY NICE GUY WITH ISSUES, BUT STILL OVERALL, A NICE GUY, DO DROP ME A NOTE AND I WILL TELL YOU MORE ABOUT THIS "REALLY NICE GUY".

I think my friend will kill me if he sees this. Isipin niya binebenta ko na siya (actually, parang ganon nga. Hwek hwek hwek!).

Puerto Galera

Since my cradle is not here, I have to make do with old pictures to post.

This one was taken two years ago during one of our group's first forays to Puerto Galera. A low-tech camera was used to take this really nice picture of us. I'm such a big standout in my white shirt.

Acquaintances and Friendships

I went to the Taft campus to meet with my groupmates this morning. We have a group report this Tuesday and the information that we need is only available in the Taft campus library. It was also the first time that I returned to the library after 7 years.

It took me awhile to get my bearings and to refamiliarize myself with the cataloguing system. My groupmates were impressed with how fast I was able to find the books from the shelves. I credit it to my high school library training. Being the nerd that I am, I spent my free hours in the library. I wanted to spend some more time there but my asthma was acting up and I could not stand the smell of old books.

After meeting with my groupmates, I had one of them drop me off at my grandparents' house in Makati. They were pleasantly surprised to see me although I did not stay long. I hailed a cab to take me back home. Upon arriving, I went online to download the program that I needed to make my genogram for my ethics class. It's a rather colorful chart. It took me a few hours to finish and I proudly showed my SO the results. Well, actually, I just told him that I included him in my chart (as "dating"). It irritated me when he questioned his presence there. What compounded to the irritation was when he asked me to change my YM picture (which featured the both of us). I know this is just a quirk of his, but it irritated me once again. I don't know. Maybe this has nothing to do with him.

I've been under pressure the past two days to do a very distasteful task that my mom asked me to do for her. Times like these that I wish I was never born. Much as I would want to ask for moral support from my SO, I don't know if he can even give me that since his family is not as dysfunctional as mine (you want dysfunctional? Just look at my genogram!). Nor has he harboured these feelings that I'm feeling for my family right now.

Ok, I just did what every eldest sibling would do in situation such as this--pass it on to the youngest (haha!). I asked my brother to do the task and gave him the specific instructions. Hopefully, he'll be able to do this to the letter.

Anyway, onto happy thoughts. Met with my barkada last night. I haven't seen them for three months and it was a happy reunion, even if it was just to watch Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (a nice watch, by the way). I missed everyone, especially Allan, my ever-wise bestprend. We managed to set a dinner date for next week for a lengthier and more private talk. It was a lively atmosphere over dinner. I really did miss everyone. Chris hasn't cut his hair in months and was the subject of our ire and teasing (from the "vaness" to the "inis" look); Edy and Ipe are still a cute couple; Ching and Mike are still going strong; and Rico is still the same subdued "bubbly" (I don't know how you can reconcile those two words, but that's how I describe him) self.

Other than picking on Chris' hair, being the un-athletic people that we are, we picked on the DLSU basketball team, moreover with their recent appearance at Cito Beltran's talk show. SO and I saw the show although we only caught the last part of the interview. Apparently, one of the players gave a really stupid answer to a really easy question which made me cringe and be ashamed of coming from the same school that he did. To give him credit, maybe he was just nervous, but how can you give an "I don't know" answer to a "What is your course all about?" question? Aaaaargggghhh!!! Franz Pumaren was the only one who made sense in that interview.

We're scheduled to come together (right now! Over me!) again on Miko's birthday at the end of this month. That will be another round of lively conversations, cigarette breaths and no doubt, alcohol-induced slumbers. Ah yes, my friendships! I missed you guys!

Hi Ho Hi Ho Off to the Shop It Goes

I returned to Electroworld Park Sqaure with the SO this lunch time to have my Palm Zire cradle checked, since it was not synching with my laptop. The attendant could not figure out what was wrong with it so he pulled it out. So I have to preserve my palm's battery since I won't be getting it back for three days or so.

OTHER NEWS

My sister-in-law is pregnant once again. She's 7 weeks on the way, which means that she'll be five months pregnant on her wedding. I do hope the gown will fit. Moreover, I do pray that she carries this baby full term. Too bad my mom won't be here to witness the birth of her first ever grandchild.

My brother-in-law's father was also rushed to the ICU yesterday due to a mild heart attack. The doctor noted that it was because of his excessive smoking that got him to where he is right now. This prompted us siblings to relaunch our "dad-you-have-to-quit-smoking" campaign. We have been nagging our dad for years and years and years to quit something. He was already hospitalized before and the doctor already advised him to quit, but no, he still kept on going. It bothered me that my half-sister loved our dad's smoky smell when we all shy away from him once we smell a whiff of cigarette smoke. We do hope that he does not learn his lesson the hard way.

My possible future father-in-law had an angioplasty a few years back and this promoted them to eat healthier (which also prompted Leo's abrupt weight loss. He lost 20 freaking pounds in less than three months!).

My cough has gone from bad to worse. Noticed that it acts up when I'm exposed to the cold. It's unfortunate that the aircon vent at work is near my area. It's more unfortunate that two jackets still did not keep the cold out during class this evening. The tightening in my chest area became more acute. I was only relieved when I managed to thaw out. I swear, I'll never survive in a cold country. I'll probably be miserable the whole time.

It will also be a contention when/if Leo and I live together. The heat bothers him easily while the cold bothers me easily. Wonder where will the compromise be in that? Heck, if my sisters survived this, I'm sure I can too (according to my sisters' stories, they also don't like the cold and their respective husbands do. I'll ask them for tips on how they managed the sleeping arrangements).

Woe is Me!

My technical difficulties does not want to end.

First of all, there's my palm. It automatically reset itself this evening. I had no idea why. This prompted me to dig up my warranty sheet and pack all my palm paraphernalia up ready for a trip to the shop tomorrow. All the while I thought it was just the cradle, now my the unit itself is acting up.

Second, there's my laptop. I can't seem to get rid of this bug that keeps on restarting my computer. I already installed two patches: WindowsXP-KB824146-x86-ENU and WindowsXP-KB835732-x86-ENU. I don't know which one will stop the auto-restart but I hope it's one of those.

I also switched my anti-virus from Norton to McAfee. Hopefully, it will do a better job than Norton from keeping all those nasty viruses (is this the plural form?) out of my system. Also installed Spyware to keep out that nasty spybot bug that keeps on lodging itself in my folders (how it gets there, I have no freaking idea).

From the technical difficulties, let's go to my breathing difficulties. I grew up as an asthmatic. At least now, my attacks are not as worse as four years before wherein I could barely get out of bed. For the past few weeks, I could feel a tightening in my chest area. The tightening developed into a cough. The sneezing followed although everything is still not yet full-blown.

I'm thinking twice of NOT getting sick. I would welcome the sick day since the load at work is not that heavy, but getting sick would mean missing a school day. I'd rather miss a day at work than a day at school.

My Marketing Management professor gave my group a very interesting case to present next week. My group will be tackling the Viagra case. My group and I had our initial meeting this evening and it was hilarious! We still have no idea how we'll report this considering that 80% of our group of five is female (meaning only one guy!). What contributed more to our hilarity was we were openly discussing erectile dysfunction in very loud voices, in a classroom shared with another group who obviously sounds like law students (yes, La Salle is offering MBA-JD in partnership with FEU).

Through this case, we found out interesting stuff about Viagra and erectile dysfunction. For one, Viagra is NOT an aphrodisiac (in contrast to what others perceive it to be). It only works for men who are suffering from erectile dysfunction. These guys can't literally, get it up.

It's interesting to note that though how well received the product is, the hype did not translate to sales. Filipino men don't like talking about their sexual performance (or lack of it) because it will go against the common macho attitude.

Anyway, our reporting for that will be Thursday next week. We have a week to figure out how to present this creatively (pogi points for us and hopefully, a 4.0!).

Leo and Sunshine

This picture was taken using my sister's 76-something phone. The image is a bit blurry (that's the difficulty when you're the one who's taking the picture) and it was on night mode. Nevertheless, I still love this picture.

Requisccat in Pace

I was momentarily stunned when I heard the news that Christopher Reeves died. I first heard about it in the radio although I only heard the last part of the breaking news. I had to call Leo (through the internet) to confirm the news flash.

It's definitely sad news since I've always equated Christopher Reeves to the Superman cartoon. Yes, I know he's not really Superman but it's ironic that he played a character who was considered the Man of Steel. I guess it goes to show that he's just human after all.

May he rest in peace.

SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER

It was Saturday night and for the first time in ages, I was home bored out of my mind. Leo's busy with work and just spent more than 8 hours in the office (on a Saturday!) and afterwards, went straight home to brood and rant about his work. I, on the other hand, spent the morning with a friend although I came home shortly after 4 pm to try to catch up with my assignments and also to relax.

To my dismay, my sister had her classmates over and they occupied our living and dining room. Since turning on the tv is not option, I could have just planted myself in front of my laptop and surfed to my heart's delight. Unfortunately, my brother was tinkering with my laptop and reinstalling stuff.

Left with no other alternative, I semi-cleaned my room although that took only an hour. I contented myself to playing some of my palm games. Nevertheless, that did not look too good considering I'm capable of amusing myself even without electricity.

Speaking of my palm, I think there's something wrong with my cradle. All the while, I thought there was a problem with my drivers, but when I tested the cradle on another PC, it still would not work. I have no other option but to go back to the shop and have the cradle checked. That's such a big hassle.

Oh yeah, my sister has a brand new spanking phone. Her husband got her the new Nokia 76-series phone (the one that's shaped like a leaf). She's the point of envy of everyone in the house right now. As much as I would want to get a new phone, I don't have the financial means to do so right now. I'm even worrying where I will get my Christmas shopping money! And most of all, I have no freaking idea what to get my SO for Christmas! What do you give someone who has (almost) everything?! And my possible-future-in-laws?! What do I give them?! ((worry worry worry))

FATTY FAT FAT

You might be wondering why I feel fat today. Well, it's what I get for more than 3 weeks of no physical activity. Ever since school started, it's difficult for us to find a free schedule to go walking or jogging. The lack of exercise slowed down my metabolism. Moreover, I've made it a habit to drink coffee in the morning (or afternoon). It's becoming part of my staple diet and I find that alarming. One cup of coffee for me can be fattening since I drink my coffee with lots of milk and sugar (my officemates call it milk with coffee). However, I've been teaching myself to drink plain tea. Is it healthier than coffee?

Earthquake!

An 6.3 earthquake hit our island 10:30 last night. It was the strongest earthquake I've experienced since the 7.1 that devastated Baguio last 1991 (prior Pinatubo).

Leo and I were at Cinema 2 of Greenbelt 3 watching Shark's Tale and I just came from the restroom. Just as I sat down, I felt my chair shake. I just looked at Leo while half of the theater's patrons hurried to the exits. I asked him whether we should be also heading for the exits but he just sat there saying that it will pass and he continued on watching as if nothing extraordinary was happening. I sat there all tense while I gripped his hand tightly silently praying that nothing catastrophic will happen.

The earthquake lasted for approximately half a minute. I immediately called the house inquiring about everyone and ensuring that everyone is safe. I informed them of my whereabouts and that I will be heading home as soon as the traffic clears (most of the people suddenly wanted to leave).

I couldn't help but be paranoid about yesterday's earthquake. The 1991 earthquake was still fresh in my mind. I was in the school's library chatting with the librarian when the quake hit. My friend and I scurried under a table and prayed for dear life while I saw the 10 ft high shelves topple over.

The swaying lights overhead (it was an old building. Ours was an old school) crashed on the table we were hiding under. I hurried home after that and I remembered crying when I got home (I was 16 years old then). Scanning this morning's news report, no major catastrophe has been reported. Thank God!

Make Up

It's been a dramatic and emotional week for me. I was torturing myself and reflecting on things which compounded the intensity of my emotions. Good thing Leo and I touched base tonight which somehow eased the anxiety and brought things to a manageable perspective. I'm glad I was able to air certain concerns out and not let my otherwise hurtful tongue, take control of the situation.

I was very much annoyed with my SO since he has not been answering my text messages for the past couple of days. I somehow understood his silence since he had an exam and case presentation tonight. I tried to be understanding but the silence just bugged me. I started getting paranoid and thinking that I might've done something to annoy him (girls, you know what I mean by this).

Whenever I try talking to him, he sounded distracted which irked me more. When we met after our respective classes, he was in high spirits because apparently, he did well in the exam and report (thank God!). While waiting for our turn to get out of the school's basement parking, I blurted out how annoyed I was for his silence. It turns out that it has been a long-term habit of his to ignore messages whenever he's busy or focused on something. He apologized and somehow, that, and the corresponding hug and "I'll make it up to you this weekend", assuaged my fears and soothed my tired spirit.

My gosh! Ganon lang ba ako kababaw? :D At least we talked. That's a good thing. I was at first, tempted to ignore him but I realized that that would lead to more heartache. I feel better now.

Lost and Found

Funny how the internet works. Not only do you find things that you need, but you also get to find long lost people (or they find you). Let's just say a person who used to be part of my life (extended family life that is) found me and we exchanged pleasantries and updated ourselves with regards to our respective lives. I'm glad he's doing well and from the looks of it, happy with his life. I wish him well.

I discovered www.unkymoods.com. It's a link which you can place in your blog that will reflect your current mood. It features different moods and being the moody person that I am, I get to relate. I think it's only applicable to females though. Maybe there are male versions.

Caught the last full show of Farenheit 9/11 last Tuesday night at Rockwell. Leo was adamant that we watch it before they take it out of the cinemas. The film won best picture at the Cannes Filmfest. Let's just say that you'll begin leaning towards becoming a Democrat after watching that film. There were a lot of conspiracies presented and somehow, it doesn't sound something new to me. We have lots of that here in my country.

Codependence Day

These past few days have been a revelation for me. I learned a few painful lessons and I resolved to learn from all of these eye-openers which would hopefully, help me before it's too late.

Before I go into that, let me share with you these things: There are three kinds/stages of a relationship. Before a couple decides to become a couple, or even before they meet, they are two independent human beings (assuming of course that they did not come from other relationships).

Stage 1: Independence
An independent human being can survive on her own. She depends on herself for happiness and any other decision, which would affect her as a human being. When two people meet and there's a certain attraction, they decide to take their relationship further by dating (for other cases, they get married immediately without exploring each other's personalities. This may work for other people while others do not). At the start of the relationship, one might be dependent on the other, in a sense that one is "superior" to the other

Stage 2: Dependence
One would depend her happiness on the other's presence and/or decisions. she loses her sense of self since she identifies herself with the other person and not as an individual.

Stage 3: Codependence
The last kind/stage of a relationship is codependence. In this case, both people in the relationship are equally dependent on the other. I believe that this is what couples should strive for. Both should work for the success of their commitment to each other. A two way thing so to speak.

These reflections came out as a result of going through bouts of jealousy and insecurity. I found myself stuck in the second stage. I realized that I've forgotten 8 years worth of lessons on independence and have become dependent on someone. I do not mean being dependent with regards to basic needs, but in the emotional, psychological and even physiological level.

Before I met Leo, I was basically alone (not counting the LDR one) for 7 years. I learned to go malling by myself, learned how to watch movies by myself, do the groceries by myself and basically, being myself without being answerable to anyone. I would do anything without consulting anyone (except for friends if their presence were needed). It was a great, albeit, lonely time, but I was my own person.

Seven months ago, Leo and I became, as what Amazing Race terms it, a "dating couple". We would be together every weekend (and sometimes during the week). We would talk everyday and consult each other for plans. We get along with each other's families and was and still is, a sickingly sweet couple. We hear mass together and spend every free time with each other. We would also go jogging/walking together. Everything was perfect.

However, things do not look as good as they seem. I recently realized that I have grown dependent on Leo with regards to my happiness and well-being. I refused to go out with other people if Leo was not with me. As much as possible, I bring him with me wherever I go. I ask special dispensation just for him to be with me for events wherein outsiders are not allowed. I feel angry or sad if he prioritizes other things before me. I finally experienced what jealousy is and old insecurities started to resurface. It may seem sweet to other people for me to feel bereft and sad with the absence of my significant other, but it's not healthy. It's not right.

Through this past seven months, I realized that I made the mistake of revolving my life and plans around this certain person who may not even agree to my plans, or may not even include me in his future plans. I made him one of my top priorities, even sometimes, surpassing my studies, work and even God. I just assumed that I'm also a top priority of his.

Bottom line was, I have loved this person so much that I've forgotten to leave some for myself. It's no secret to him or to the whole world how much I would want to get married. It does not help that people around me are getting married left and right. All my siblings are married (civil rites though) and their church weddings will be this December and January. A person at work will also be getting hitched next year. Whenever friends see me, the first thing they ask me is when will my wedding date be. All these things converged and coagulated into one thought of getting married. Immediately!

However, it is also not a secret to me that Leo's not ready to settle down. I thought I respected that but I was unconsciously pressuring him to pop the question. I'd talk endlessly about weddings, rings, dates, churches etc. hoping I can get him to change his mind. Whenever I would bring the topic up and receive a non-committal reply, I was setting myself up for disappointment. I was pressuring him and myself for something which he (and maybe I) am not ready to get into. It was a hard lesson. One I had to learn by myself.

No, Leo and I are not breaking up (I hope so. But then, he hasn't read this yet). I'm not that stupid to give up something so special and so wonderful. I still love Leo very much. I just have to shift my paradigm and hopefully, make decisions for the betterment of myself and to save our relationship from further harm. Though how understanding and patient Leo is with me, I have to bring myself to change. He can only be understanding and patient up to a certain degree. I cannot expect him to always understand me everytime I go through a jealous fit. I have to reconstruct my plans, my hopes and my dreams or better yet, come up with Plan B.

A wedding and marriage can wait. I received good advice from people that I should not rush this. Though how loud and fast my body clock is ticking (I will be 30 in a year's time), I just have to try my best to ignore it and leave the rest to God. Everything will happen in God's time. Maybe one day, Leo and I will reach that codependence stage and most importantly, maybe one beautiful day in the future, I may get to walk down that elusive aisle.

That's Done (For Now)

Leo and I had a late dinner Thursday night and I got home almost midnight. It was useless to panic but I had to get up early the next day since we're going to Tarlac for the Outreach and meeting time was 6 freaking AM (and I thought those days were over).

Unfortunately, I could not sleep immediately and I ended up only having 3 hours worth of sleep. I only managed to get a few minutes of shut-eye in the coaster but fortunately, I was able to survive the Outreach without snapping at people. I even enjoyed myself.

I also had so much to eat yesterday. After our turnover at the Aeta school, we had a lunch buffet and I tried VERY hard (and succeeded) in not gorging myself with the Kapampangan delicacies. When we got back to Manila almost 3 hours later, my boss had 3 bilaos of pancit delivered to celebrate her 29th birthday (yep, she's only 29 yet she's my boss and an AVP) plus some tarts from DeliFrance. I also broke a vow and drank a cup of coke and a cup of sprite.

Leo picked me up around 8 pm and we had dinner at a Japanese restaurant at Rockwell (Leo was hungry so he ordered a LOT). I have to compensate for all those eating yesterday. Hopefully, SO's not that hungry today so we can maybe skip merienda. The sugar and caffeine yesterday helped me through the day, but I experienced a crash when Leo brought me home from Rockwell. I fell asleep while we were watching TV and I crawled up to bed. Not even waking up when Leo tried calling me on my cell to tell me he's home (I always wake up whenever he does that).

My palm and my laptop are not synching. I have all these nice pictures that I took of my Clark trip and our outreach that I wanted to post here. I have to figure out how to resolve this hardware problem. I'm thinking of getting a new OS for my laptop. WinXP has too many bugs.

I'm still sleepy. One of these days, I'll be able to get enough sleep to satisfy my body. Whenever that will be, I have no idea but I hope it will be soon. My memory has gotten so bad due to the lack of sleep.

Sevenfold

It's one of those weeks that I wish was over. At least it's going to be Thursday tomorrow.

I had a 3 hour lunchbreak today. I went to the grocery of SM Makati to buy the goods that we're distributing to the Aeta kids this Friday. It was the first time that I bought in bulk. Imagine the surprise of the merchandisers when I asked for 680 pcs of Payless Noodles, 340 pcs of Palmolive Soap, 1020 sachets of Vaseline shampoo, 170 pcs of Beam toothpaste and Colgate Toothbrush.

I wish though that I was notified of this even a month in advance so I could have solicited from P&G or Unilever even. But no! They had to tell me a week from the actual event. Good thing there's budget. The whole shopping trip put a PHP15K dent on my credit card (and they'd better reimburse me before my due date. I am forced to be a transactor).

It's unfortunate that we all can't go. Only my boss and I will be going. It's a weekday (and a Friday at that) and we need people to man the fort. However, I'll ask for special dispensation from our boss. It is, after all, her birthday and start of the month. Maybe other people from our department can join us.

Leo and I also celebrated our 7th month of togetherness yesterday. After our class, we had dinner at the Chinese Monk at Rockwell. We were actually looking for Japanese, but unfortunately, the restaurants were already closed (it was after 9 pm already). It's a big countdown to our first year anniversary. It's five more months, but I'm sure it's going to be fast.

We also had one of our heart to heart talks regarding our relationship and where we're headed. I'm so happy we had that talk. Let's just say, 30 will be a good age for us (he's four months younger than me).

I'm Back! (Again)

Just got back from my annual retreat. It was actually a Singles for Christ (SFC) Metro Manila/Luzon Conference held at Clark Expo. This year's theme was "Masayang mag-SFC" (It's happy to be in SFC).

I left Manila, Saturday morning together with my chapter head and his wife and daughter, and my SO. We arrived at Clark after an hour and a half of travel and immediately threw ourselves to the morning's activities. I was prepared to sit down and listen to talks but apparently, the organizers had a different idea.

The whole morning was devoted to physical exercises akin to teambuilding. We, as a team, balanced balloons, went up an oil-slicked slide, formed ourselves into a square blindfolded, brain-stormed and over-analyzed a simple case, then went outside in the 12 o'clock sun to form the longest line.

It was physically taxing, moreover with the scorching heat. I'm happy that the SO gamely participated and only rested when I rested (which was more often than not since I had low endurance when it comes to physical activities). After the longest line, we hurried off to Fontana and I had a long luxurious shower. One of the speakers was right in saying that we are a low-sweat generation. We deplore being sweaty. We complain when it gets hot. Hey, I'm guilty of that. I believe what they wanted to point out was that, we can still have fun regardless of the heat and sweat. A person's character can be tested when he/she is placed under extreme conditions. In this case, staying cool even when the unbearable heat is beating down our heads and backs.

We promptly headed back around 4 pm. I was excited to listen to the talks but was disappointed when they gave way instead, to the competitions. I had to endure 2 competitions (SFC idol and a group dance contest) before the talks started (hey, the competitions were still enjoyable!). Unfortunately, just when the first talk started, our chapter head's daughter had to go home due to the cold (she's only 7 months!) and Leo and I were the designated drivers. On the way out, we were stopped by the organizers and almost refused to grant us permission to leave. Good thing I was with my chapter head so we managed to find the exit without being harassed.

I immediately told my chapter head that though the reason may be justified, I still found it (not allowing people to leave the conference site while the talks were going on) disrespectful. I may understand their decision if the conference were for YFC (Youth for Christ) delegates, but we are SFC members--supposedly adults. As adults, we should be responsible for our own actions. We should be mature enough to make our own decisions--decisions which have been molded and melded from other SFC activities prior to the event.

In this case, if we left the conference even if the talks are not yet over, our decision should be respected BUT we do have to live with the consequences of our actions (missing the good talks and sharings and losing the learnings that we may learn from them). Anyway, most of the people I know who goes to conferences join because of the talks and sharings. It is due to an emergency that we had to leave early (not to mention, I had one hell of a headache that night and the signs of a coming sore-eye). Thinking about it, maybe they just want people to stay to emphasize the importance of the talks (did I mention that they had the concessionaires stop selling food and other stuff as well?). But they were contradicting themselves when they were talking about free-will and respect and then they do that. (I might get a lecture here about obedience. Hehe).

Anyway, going back to the conference. I was still thankful because I enjoyed the songs of praises and worship. It's been a long time ever since my spirit was fed like that. My SO also joined the worship sessions (sans raising of hands). He's no stranger to such events since he and his family are also members of another religious organization (which came highly recommended by my sector head when I asked him about it). I also spent time with friends whom I have not seen for a long time due to work and school.

I have somehow reestablished my line to God. Even if there are a bit of static, I can somehow make out His voice now. That's a good thing. Leo and I also had a talk about my jealous moment. I managed to open my side and tell him how I felt. His explanation pacified me and he gave me a hug, telling me again and again how much he loves me (awwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!). It's a learning experience for me. Thanks for those who gave me advice on how to deal with this. Talking it over without hurling accusations and letting emotions rule surely made the thing easier to deal with. At least we managed to get that issue out of the way. That's another good thing.

Anyway, I should start working on my papers now. I should start on those things before I start panicking again. At least I'm glad that I somehow managed to renew myself spiritually now. Hopefully, I will be able to sustain this so I can reflect it on my work and school life.

It's Contagious!

I just read the news that a friend is pregnant. She's my third friend who's now carrying a baby (kudos to Lenina, Rachelle and Cessna!). One is due to give birth Feb next year, another on April and this new one on May.

I can't help but want the same thing. Yes, I know. Patience is a virtue and everything will happen in God's time. I keep on repeating that to myself with hope that it will sink in and help my mind think of other productive things--like papers that are due on Tuesday and Thursday. I should think about those. And my deplorable financial condition. I should think of that too!

I should stop writing and rest now. Tiredness has a way of sucking all the positive thoughts out of one's mind and character.

Hey, Jealousy!

Tomorrow we can drive around this town And let the cops chase us around The past is gone but something might be found To take its place...hey jealousy --Gin Blossoms

Jealousy is a foreign emotion to me. For me, jealousy is a sign of insecurity. I have never felt insecure over my past relationships because I truly believed that my past boyfriends loved me (which may be true). One even broke up with me because he said that I was not jealous enough (doh!).

The point that I am feeling it right now bothers the hell out of me. I do not want to go into details of the who's and the how's and the when's. I'm still trying to sort everything out into my mind.

Logic tells me that I have no reason to be jealous and that I am very much loved, but I can't help but feel uncomfortable. A friend suggested that I go and quietly ask him point blank, which I will indeed do this weekend. Nevertheless, planning the talk still won't pacify me. The thought is nagging and chewing slowly a ragged path down the center of my heart.

My boyfriend is the sweetest guy on earth--for me. It bothers me that other people (especially girls) see him the same way. Am I being selfish? Am I being paranoid? Am I being possessive? Am I such a bad person? How come I suddenly feel like I'm not special anymore? I'm out in the fringe here and grasping straws as I go.

This emotion is so foreign to me that I don't know how to deal with it. Is this a good sign? I'm lifting this all up to God. He'll help me deal with this. He'll keep my thoughts pure and help me not to be judgmental. He'll help me listen with an open heart and an open mind.

EOM

Can't wait for this week/month to be over. It's been a difficult month for SO and I. Difficult in a sense that we're both pressured at work and it tested our relationship. I'm glad though that we pulled through that one.

Noticed that I'm more tired than usual lately. I could attribute it to the lack of sleep due to my 6am to 2 pm shift. (un)Fortunately, I'll be back on the regular grind of 830 to 530 starting next week. At least that will give me enough time to sleep now. Although it will limit my free time.

Leo and I will be heading for Clark this weekend together with my SFC friends for my annual retreat. This retreat is so long overdue. I badly need to refresh my spiritual side and to feed my soul. The banal world ate too much of my spirit. I need to recharge. I also figured that my physical tiredness can also be due to my tired spirit.

I'll be going to Tarlac tomorrow morning together with our VP for Corporate Affairs. We will do an ocular at our company's Aeta school for our outreach scheduled next week. It's going to be very tight because our VP wants us to be back in Manila before lunch! There's a lot of stuff going on at work right now and we need to be there. This is going beyond my job description but since load is very light in our area and our boss did ask me to come up with an outreach project, I was roped into this.

We'll be passing by Pampanga on the way back and I'm so tempted to ask to be dropped off somewhere there since I'll be going there on Saturday. But well, if I do that, who will go with Leo?

Reset

I had to reset my palm since it "hanged" on me this morning. Goodbye game records. Now, I have to track down the people who beamed me those games and have them re-beam them to me again (Insaniquarium, Dinosaur something, Bookworm et al). I'm also currently synchronizing my palm to my pc back-up. I'm so glad I synced a few days ago enabling me to save the pictures taken at my friend's wedding. Although I don't think I was able to sync my new additions to my calendar and things to do list.

It has been a slow start to my Monday. I barely met my quota today. However, I did have some other things to do. I had to finish a User Acceptance Test, plan for an outreach that we're planning to hold Friday next week (all the way to Tarlac!), and planning for a presentation this Wednesday.

I'm glad that schoolwork is not that heavy this term. In fact, both my subjects do not have finals! And my other subject does not have any quizzes/exams! I think I made a mistake in grouping the subjects. Next term, I'm going to take up Management Accounting and Production Management. Yep, I definitely made a mistake

Flowers

This was part of the first bouquet that Leo gave me. He gave me two dozen peach roses on our first month celebration. The roses were so pretty that I could not help but take a picture. The flowers were so beautiful!




This was also from Leo. It's part of a bouquet of tulips given on our second month. After that though, the flowers stopped. It was getting too expensive and it was not practical.


LOST IT

I think I've lost 20 lbs since last January. Not bad huh? I can fit into some old clothes again. Now the problem now is to find clothes that won't make me look like a hanger. God, I can't afford a closet overhaul right now. Hmmm...I think I'm down to size 12 now. I think I'll be happy with a Size 10, but knowing my mom, she won't be happy until I'm an 8 or even a 6! *sigh* I'll just do my best.

Nevertheless, it feels great to wear clothes that won't look as if the buttons would pop out any minute. Even my pants are a bit lose now. I have to buy belts to make sure that they don't suddenly fall down to my ankles.


NAME GAME

Got this from Ri's blogsite. Quite amusing.

PORN STAR NAME (NAME OF FIRST PET + STREET YOU LIVE IN)

Kitty Marcelino (sounds like something from the 70's. But hey, it does work!)

MOVIE STAR NAME (NAME OF YOUR FAVORITE SNACK FOOD + GRANDFATHER'S FIRST NAME)

Pretzel Ruben (hmmm...sounds...catchy)

FASHION DESIGNER NAME (FIRST WORD YOU SEE ON YOUR LEFT + FAVORITE RESTAURANT)

Beef Recipes (ok. I just finished dinner and I'm suddenly hungry again)

EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS (Favorite Spice + Last Vacation Spot Visited)

Pepper Galera (now THAT sounds like a bold star!)

SOCIALITE ALIAS (SILLIEST CHILDHOOD NICKNAME + TOWN WHERE YOU FIRST PARTIED)

Dinedine Paranaque

"FLY GIRL" ALIAS (FIRST INITIAL + FIRST TWO OR THREE LETTERS OF YOUR LAST NAME

C. Dav.

ICON ALIAS (SOMETHING SWEET WITHIN SIGHT + ANY LIQUID IN KITCHEN)

Milk Water

DETECTIVE ALIAS (FAVORITE BABY ANIMAL + WHERE YOU WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL)

Kitten St. Scho

BARFLY ALIAS (LAST SNACK FOOD YOU ATE + YOUR FAVORITE BAR DRINK)

Pretzels Cruiser

SOAP OPERA ALIAS (MIDDLE NAME + STREET WHERE YOU FIRST LIVED)

Sunshine Indiana

ROCK STAR ALIAS (FAVORITE CANDY/DESSERT + LAST NAME OF FAVORITE MUSICIAN)

Chocolate Nievera

Mr. Sandman

I am so tempted to take sleeping pills. No, I'm not in the verge of suicide. I just want something that would make me sleep for at least 8 hours. I need that 8 hours.

Ever since I can remember, I've always been an early-riser--regardless of the time I sleep. I always open my eyes before 7 am (and lately 530 or 6 am). My body clock is so damn efficient.

It has also been a long time since I woke up refreshed. Most of the time, I would wake
tired. Like last night for instance. I slept at around 130 or 2 am. I woke up at 7 am feeling very groggy. I dragged myself off to my delighted masseuse (I haven't visited her for more than 6 months and she remarked how much weight I've lost. Hah!) and had a massage which would hopefully relax me enough to make me
sleep better tonight. I'm so freaking tired *sigh*.

13 Going on 30

(Spoiler Alert!)

Since I'm very much spaced out due to the late hour, I wanted to deter writing this review until tomorrow. But I wanted to write things down before they start disappearing from my memory banks (my short term memory is so bad. I can't remember what I ate for breakfast!).

Fridays are the worst days in terms of work. Everyone is so lazy that productivity is so low. Moreover, the SO is not having a good time at work as well. It's the second Friday in a row that we could not go out on a Friday because he had to work overtime. Oh well, I shouldn't complain. These things happen. Good thing that my officemates invited me to go out with them. We watched 13 Going on 30.

That actually wasn't our first nor even second choice. During the day, we were arguing (it was just us girls) on what to watch. One half (including me) wanted to watch Feng Shui (no, I did not want to watch it because of Kris Aquino. But I've heard that it's good), while the other half wanted to watch The Terminal (saw it already. Nothing I would want to see again). When we got to the theater, only 13 Going on 30 has the available seats and the right time for us.

At the start of the movie, I knew I was going to enjoy the film. The opening credits rolled in with "Head Over Heels" playing in the background. I was bouncing on my seat. Fashion was definitely so 1987 and I could relate. There were the same music artists (Michael Jackon's Thriller, Madonna's Crazy for you, and so on and so forth), same hairstyles (big hair and side pony) and the same high school stereotypes.

For those still unfamiliar with the story (spoiler alert!), it was about a 13-year old girl who wanted to be 30 Flirty and Fabulous. Due to some wishing dust provided by her bestfriend, she woke up the next day in the body of her 30-year old self (played by the very sexy Jennifer Garner). Her adventures as a 13-year old girl trapped in the body of a 30-year old career woman were so hilarious. There was a dance number of Thriller that one should look forward to. AS we say in the office, "Winner!".

As the movie progresses, Jennifer Garner's character discovers how different she has become. She managed to achieve and gain all that she has wanted ever since she was 13, but at the expense of family, friends and even her own self. During this self-discovery, she managed to track down her bestfriend played by the very endearing Mark Ruffalo (why is he always the guy who gets left behind? Remember his character in "View from the Top". Gwyneth Paltrow leaves him but she goes back to him in the end. In both characters, he has such terrific families) and he helped her figure out what she had lost.

After a betrayal from her supposed-girl bestfriend, she rushes off to her bestfriend's wedding and they had this little confrontation/heart-to-heart talk a few minutes before the guy's altar date. That scene reduced me to blubbering tears. They both admitted that they love each other, with the guy loving her since they were kids. But in the end, the guy, being the gentleman and the sweetest guy that he is, chose his fiancee and went on with the wedding. But before that, he returned to her the dollhouse that he made for her on her 13th birthday. I was crying on my officemate's shoulder by that time.

Of course, such a sappy movie should have a happy ending. She managed to go back to her old 13-year old self and made the right choices.

The movie may carry a wrong message that you can always go back to undo things that you have done. However, taking it into the correct context, I think what it meant to say was that for us to be careful in making decisions and to think twice before we wish for something that we know is not good for us.

I could also relate to the movie's angst-y moments, especially the high school scenes. It made me go back to my high school days. Contrary to what people think, I did not really enjoy my high school life that much--except for the few friends that I had made. I was such a nerd and I'd rather spend my free time (lunch hour and dismissal) in the library. When I was in Grade School, I remembered finishing all the Nancy Drew books collection in the Learning Resource Center. Even the Indian/Hindu Comics, I did not ignore. I would stay there for hours reading through the whole series and familiarizing myself with the Hindu gods. And upon high school, I discovered a new set of books and tackled the library's more mature fiction. In our high school library, I met Sidney Sheldon and Robert Ludlum. In a little corner, I found out the library's fairy collection.

I was, you could say, not interested in boys then. All I wanted to do was read.

Anyway, I digress.

13 Going on 30 is a surprisingly good movie. I did not expect much from it at first. But I'm recommending the movie to anyone who would want to watch a nice romantic sappy movie. If you're not into that, you could watch it for Jennifer Gardner's colorful outfits. She's so darn sexy!

Tests and Other Stuff

Being the start of the term and a weekday with nothing to do, I decided to surf around and answer some of the tests that my friends seem to love. Here's one from Tickle.

What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?

Catherine, you're a Steady Supporter

Stand by your man — that's just something you naturally do. Once you've committed to a relationship, you are a constant companion who enjoys the comfort and stability that comes from being a couple. Not quick to judge, accuse, or think the worst, you have a lot of trust (in him and in yourself), and you rarely worry about where he is or who he's with.

My gosh, I absolutely sound so boring! But hey, it does sound so me. Maybe that's what my SO wants. Maybe I should show this to him and get his take on it. Hehe.

According to the list, other types of girlfriends are:
- Amorous Adventurer
- Laidback Lover
- Passionate Partner
- Romantic Realist

Come to think of it, I think I'm happy being a Steady Supporter. If there's one thing I value in a relationship and in myself, it's stability. Emotional, Spiritual or Financial, it doesn't matter as long as everything's in a balance. I know that might be highly improbable, but as long as one is met, I can survive.

I don't know what made me consider having a "stable" relationship rather than a tumultuous and passionate one that some of my friends seem to prefer. Maybe because I'm growing old. Maybe I could have entered into such a relationship if I was younger, but age brings wisdom. Maybe having a stable relationship would give me something permanent to hold on to, considering that my family life has been pretty unstable for the past few years (nothing much I can do about that).

Wanting a relationship would not necessarily mean that my happiness would be dependent on the other person. I do love spending time with my SO, but I ensure that I can be happy and complete even if I'm by myself. One trap that I would not want to fall in is that I revolve my life around my SO. Making him the source of my happiness and/or sadness. That I would not want to happen. Somewhere in the future, there will be a time when we will be apart (whether temporarily or permanent) and I would want to be happy even without him. I'm sure I will miss him, but I do not want to be suicidal just because he's gone.

What's Your Romantic Fantasy?

Catherine, looks like your romantic fantasy is Breakfast in Bed!

There are few things better than waking up to the smell of hot coffee and sizzling bacon, or fresh fruit and granola, especially when it's right under your nose. What is it about the combination of breakfast and bed? It can be more intimate than a candlelit dinner, yet as comfortable as an old pair of slippers. And this is only the start of your Breakfast in Bed romantic fantasy.

Yours is a dream inhabited by your trusty sweetheart and reliable soul mate, not by mysterious men from exotic places. Whether it's a cozy night next to a roaring fire, or an evening eating pizza straight from the box while wrapped up in a blanket on the floor, you love the fact that your fantasy doesn't need to venture far from reality.

That doesn't mean you don't like a good surprise every now and then. Flowers on your pillow or tickets to the hot new show are enough to provide a year's worth of future daydreams.

I was laughing when I read this. The first thing that came into mind was that I would never eat in bed. One thing that has been taught to us and which we learned the hard way, is that if you eat in bed, ants will surely come! So if it's going to be breakfast in bed, there should be no sugar and nothing that would attract those darn ants! I also don't see the roaring fire. The only time I ever experienced a fire place was when we were in Baguio with a 10 degrees celsius temperature outside. But hey, if the weather will permit, why not, coconut?!

Other fantasies are:

- Castle in the Sky
- Garden of Eden
- Romantic Rescue
- Romp on the Beach
- The Foreign Affair

Man, after seeing all those fantasies, I'm beginning to think that I am indeed boring! Hehehe.

I am Spring!

You're a Spring.
You usually are very close-knit with your friends and value everyone friendship you have.
You're a real people person and everyone loves how friendly you are.
You're good with encouraging people but usually don't like to be the center of attention.
You are a social butterfly and probably are in several circles of friends but it's just because you're well liked and you make people comfortable.
You're both fun and wise but you are very realistic about life.


What season are you? brought to you by Quizilla


Don't see the point of knowing what my season is. It's just one of those things that you would want to know just for the heck of it.

Updates

I haven't updated my blogspot for the past four days. Had difficulty logging in since I had to compete with two other people for internet time. Oh wait, make that four since my sister has a new laptop. (My twin sister married a techie who's based in the States. So he sent her a spanking new Thinkpad and my other sister bought the old Dell laptop. Heck, their laptops are more updated than mine! Theirs have wireless lan cards! Waaaahhh!!!)

Let me see, where do I start with the updates.

SATURDAY

I had a fun start for my Saturday. I met up with an old friend in the morning and we had a buffet breakfast at the Makati Shangri-la (her treat!). We spent 2 glorious hours there where we swapped stories and she gave me wonderful advice regarding my career. Afterwhich, we walked to Glorietta where she helped me choose a nice foundation make-up. We then proceeded to Going Straight where I had a footspa (with pedicure) and hot oil/henna wax (her treat again! Grabe! Sobrang nahiya ako). I felt so great and presentable afterwards. Good thing since I had dinner that night with my SO's family.




That's me together with my friend, Kay. As I mentioned previously, she's relocating to Cebu by next month. It's sad how we take friends for granted sometimes. Like us for example. We've been schoolmates since grade school and became good friends/barkada in high school. We joined the same college in DLSU (only to abandon her after a year). Nevertheless, we stayed in touch even afterwards and we meet around once a year (even more than a year). When I saw her last Saturday, I realized how much I've missed her. How much I've missed her humour and her generousity (it's not everyday that I have a friend who treats me to a nice breakfast and self-pampering package. Heck! When we were in high school/college, she'd use to give me bags of lanzones from their very own plantation!). She also made me realize how lucky I am and that there are some people who hide their insecurities well. She also gave me a sermon regarding my insecurities. Being the healthy people we are, she told me to stop comparing myself to other people and to start feeling beautiful in my own right. As Christina Aguilera's song goes:

We are beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring us down
We are beautiful in every single way
Words can't bring us down
Don't let it bring us down today.

We are definitely beautiful and she proved that beauty definitely comes from within. It's just that some people doesn't know how to see beyond the physical aspect and look what's really inside. Kay is one of the most beautiful people that I have had the priveledge of knowing and it's a big loss that most men does not see that (heck, my SO saw how beautiful she is. Shows how special my SO is. Hah!).

After the self-pampering, I caught a cab going to Alabang Town Center where I met up with Leo. We watched "Dodgeball" (a must-watch! Ben Stiller is very much hilarious here: "Don't make me bleed in my own blood.") and as previously mentioned, had dinner at Via Mare with Leo's parents, Leo's sister and brother-in-law.

Leo's parents invited me to watch a show that their community sponsored. They're both active members of the Folkalare. I think they want me to be a member too. I have no complaints since our Sector Head at Singles for Christ even endorsed the group to me. The group is actually non-sectarian and teaches the basic principle of all religions: Love, Peace and Family.

SUNDAY

My good friend at work (actually she resigned already) got married in Christian rites last Sunday at EDSA Shangri-la. Here's a picture featuring me and Leo. The picture turned out OK. First time that we attended a formal gathering together. Must say that we look good!




First time I attended a Christian wedding and it's definitely different than a Catholic one. There's still the exchange of vows and rings, but the ceremony is shorter. The vows were also made by the couple. Not something that they read off a misalette. I may follow that in my own wedding. I would want my vows to come from my heart and not from somebody's else's wedding.




The bride and groom are the pair on the far right (of course, the bride is the one wearing the really nice gown and her groom is the one behind her). I hope I don't step on anyone's toes when I say this, but her wedding was the most beautiful wedding that I've attended in terms of people. I have never seen so many beautiful people in my entire life! My friend was so enchanting and her sisters and family, my gosh! I have never seen a family that's so beautifully blessed! You could say that it's because they are a happy family. Her mother approached our table and greeted me like she've known me all my life. I was so embarassed because apparently, my friend talks to her about me. She kept on complementing me and that doubled my embarassment because coming from her, I knew it was sincere (because of that, she earned a spot in my principals sponsor list for my wedding--as if!). My friend and her family are the most sincere and honest people I have ever met. That's why she's always so radiant.

MONDAY

Technically first day of school but my first class was today. Nothing special at work (although I did exceed my productivity by 64%. Got a commendation from my boss because of that).

TUESDAY

My first class and Leo's my classmate! We had Business Ethics this evening. I admit, I had dificulty concentrating at first with Leo there by my side. But I managed to concentrate on the subject and hopefully, would be able to apply the learnings to my life.

3 AM

I woke up at 3 freaking-thirty this morning, after having only 4 hours of sleep. I could not remember what woke me up but I had a difficult time falling back to sleep.

Noticed that this has been happening for the past couple of days. I tried
playing that lovely palm Bejeweled game to lull me to sleep but it did not work.
I just turned off the lights and laid there thinking.

So many thoughts ran through my mind this morning. All of them quite disturbing. One major thought was regarding a decision which I had to make regarding my career. So many questions, but the answers are so few (that sounds like a line from a song).

I tried to discern and use the techniques that I have culled from the numerous
seminars that I've attended for the past four years with SCB. One particular
technique refers to prioritizing. Once I get my priorities straight, then making
the choice will not be difficult. Will I priorities my studies or my work more?
Am I the type of person who would go for career growth? Or am I the type of
person who wants to develop her character more than her career? (Hmmm...writing
this all down makes decision making so much easier! Looks like I'm getting
something here.)

I have received negative comments from people who I have asked and they have raised valid points. But those points would be relevant if I would prioritize one more than the other. I have until Monday to make my decision. Hopefully, I will make the right one. Please do keep me in your prayers.

Oh yeah, I ended up getting up at 5 am to prepare breakfast and was at work by 6
am. After drinking coffee in the morning and caramel coffee jelly in the
afternoon, I stayed in the office until 730 pm still awake and kicking although
my brain then already shut down. I also barely ate anything the whole day (if
you don't count the bagel during breakfast). Good thing this rarely happens.

Fridays are the worst day to work. It's the day with our lowest productivity and
it's difficult to get people to work. I also have to wake up early tomorrow.
Have a breakfast date with an old friend at the Makati Shangri-la. We haven't
seen each other in ages and we wanted to see each other before she relocates to
Cebu next month.

White Beach

This was taken at White Beach, Puerto Galera last April. The background is really that blue! I suddenly miss the place. It would be nice to go there at this time of the year. Rates and prices will be 100% lower than last April!

Walking with Sunshine

Ok.

So changed my web address. It's difficult to rant and remain anonymous when your url address is basically telling the whole world who you are.

Things are a bit shaky now. I'm trying to balance everything and hope that my eggs and oranges won't fall splat on the floor. One thing's for sure, a major crossroad is coming up soon and hopefully, I'll be able to make the right choice.

Chores

CHORES

I'm muscle tired again.

Rather than let the dirty clothes pile up until Saturday, we did the laundry today. It took us more than two hours just to finish three days worth of dirty clothes worn by 7 people. I feel more tired than the 30 minute walking/jogging that I did yesterday. Come to think of it, this may be the daily exercise that I need. However, I was able to do this since we're in the middle of term break. Once school starts, I don't know how much I'll be able to contribute to household chores.

Speaking of school, I got my grades for my subjects last term. I got a 3.5 for my law subject and a 3.0 for my economics subject. Not bad. Was hoping to make it to the Dean's List again this term, but well, maybe next term.

SQUATTER

I feel like a squatter at work today. I had no permanent workstation and it affected my positive outlook and productivity. I had to change workstation three times. I'll never survive like this until the end of the year. My vacation is so far off!

Speaking of vacation, I'm taking almost a month off starting December 16, 2004 and will return to work on January 10, 2005. This is in lieu of my brother and sister's wedding on December 28 and January 5 respectively. If my parents/siblings had it their way, they will have it both in December. However, due to the different beliefs and old wives tales, they had to reschedule it on different years.

This would also mean that my wedding (if ever there's going to be one) won't happen until 2006!

Oh well, as an old friend would say, "Good things comes to those who wait."

All By Ourselves

Day four of having no househelp.

Our househelp of almost seven years had to rush home at Bicol due to an emergency (her son had an accident). Much as I enjoy (not) the exercise culled from all the household chores, it's still very tiring.

Just this morning, my sister-in-law and I did the laundry, I cleaned the living room and arranged our 250+ dvd collection, I also washed the dishes after lunch.

When Leo came to pick me up at around 1 pm, I was wilting. All I wanted was to lie down and sleep. But nevertheless, I took a bath (scrubbed myself down with RiceMilk scrub and tried to get every dirt that I accumulated out of my skin) and made myself presentable.

We then proceeded to Greenbelt 1 where we watch Supersize Me. Ah yes, Supersize Me. I recommend this movie to EVERYONE. After watching that movie, I will never look
at McD's the same way ever again. It made me resolve that I will never let my
children (if ever I'll be blessed to have them) be too addicted to fastfood
chains. I will never use Jollibee or McDonald's as a reward for them.

The movie also revealed some interesting facts. Americans are the fattest people on earth, and it's somehow correlated to their fastfood industry. Their food portions are directly proportional to their weight. I was shocked when I saw that they had a
supersize meal. I thought that it was equivalent to our local version of "Go
Bigtime" or "Go Large", but apparently, "Supersize Me" is twice as big as the
regular serving. So you have the kiddie size, regular size, biggie size AND
supersize!

One of the postcripts said that after the film came out at the Sundance festival, Mcd's removed the Supersize option from their menu and introduced a meal to promote an active lifestyle as opposed to a sedentary one.

The documentary came about after the director/producer saw an article about two teenage girls suing McD's for feeding them food which lead to their obesity. The judge wanted to trash the lawsuit but gave the girls the chance to prove that the food from McD's were the direct cause of their extreme weight gain. Morgan Spurlock (the director/producer) wanted to prove if that could happen so he ate NOTHING but food from the McDonald's menu for 30 days.

It's a very interesting film and it documented his McDonald's trips and his consultations with his doctors. A lot of points raised by this movie especially about health. No wondermy mom is so worried about me and my weight.

Speaking of weight, I lost 5 lbs last month and hopefully, I'm continuing to lose. I'm due at my doctor for two more weeks and I pray that I've lost a decent amount by then.

Enchanted Kingdom

Went to Enchanted Kingdom last Saturday with Leo. First time I had the roller coaster (Space Shuttle) all by myself. I was literally, the only one, on the ride. It was scary and exciting. A bit boring though since I was the only one screaming and laughing. Nevertheless, the ride still managed to draw more than once scream from me. The 4-D Theater was also nice. It sucks that you have to pay separate entrance for that.

Ziggurat

This is the interior of the restaurant where we had dinner last Friday. Pretty cozy. Food is good too.

Thank God It's Friday

I went to confession after a long time. It was such a rewarding experience in a sense that it gave me a chance to unload all the excess baggage that I've been carrying. Too much negativity is not good for one's health. Let's just say that I managed to regain my positive outlook on life and I'm happy once again.

Leo and I had dinner at a hole-in-the-wall restaurant somewhere in Makati Ave. (I took a picture of the interior of the place. Will post it tomorrow). The food was surprisingly good. It was a place that served Mediterranean/Indian/Greek fare.

We had pita bread, and some other stuff whose names I forgot. I remember the kebab though. The chicken and the beef/pork was very tender and very flavorful. Will definitely recommend the place to everyone.

Ah here's the name: ZIGGURAT. Not an easy name to forget. It's not an easy place to find though. It's in one of those side streets along Burgos St. in Makati. You won't find it unless you're looking for it.

Leo and I will also be going to Enchanted Kingdom tomorrow. I do hope that it won't rain. I've been wanting to go back to that place. Last time I went there, it was my birthday last 2001. Quite a long time.

San Jose Church

I love churches. The older the better. One of my dreams is to go church hopping all over the Philippines. And who knows, I may want to get married in an old church myself.

The above picture was taken while we were on our way to Pagudpod, Ilocos early this year. This was the San Jose church at Candon, Ilocos Sur.

Offer

I received a job offer today and I have spent the whole afternoon thinking whether I should take it or not. If I were to think of the compensation only, I might take the bait. However, I also have to consider the benefits.

When I attended the case workshop on my first term, the professor shared some tidbits on job changing. Before that, he identified the top reasons on why people leave:
1. boss/immediate superior
2. working environment
3. compensation
4. work itself

I have no problems with the first two. I do, however, have problems with the third issue. For a multinational employee, I am underpaid compared to my peers. The reason for the unequal distribution is that some of the officers who has the same level as mine (or even one rank below), have been in the bank longer. Moreover, some of them were pirated from other companies, thus the higher pay.

The professor further added that if you have no problems with the first two, only accept the offer if compensation is at LEAST 40% that what you're getting right now. The thing is, I'll be leaving a really great boss and a great team. Will I be happier when I move to the other company? Moreover, the company is a local one and not as par with my current employer.

Upon discussing this issue with my SO, he said that he will support me in whatever decision I will make. However, he just asked me why people are not satisfied with what they have. It was a matter of a fact question but it hit me. Hard. I have always been happy with what I have. The issue of compensation has never bothered me before--except now. Leo reminded me that there are things more important than money. He also reminded me that we should be happy with what God has given us and not go searching for more things which would eventually lead to more problems.

I still haven't truly decided on my course of action. The offer is not formal yet. I just had initial discussions with the manager. I'll just cross the bridge when I get there.

General Room Cleaning

I cleaned my room when I got home this afternoon. Other than putting my books in a semblance of order and reorganizing my notes, I reformatted my laptop.

Though it's such a big hassle reformatting and reinstalling programs, but there's something exciting on starting afresh. I managed to reconfigure my system to adapt to my changing needs.

I'm still not yet done in installing other programs, but I managed to reinstall the necessary ones (MS Office, Yahoo Messenger, PH Stat).

Part of my housekeeping is to FINALLY organize my postcard collection in a photo album. It was fun going back to some of the postcards (I think the oldest one was 10 years ago). I have a number of postcards from Europe, and one from Nepal (although I'm trying to figure out who came from Nepal....oh yeah! It was a friend of a friend!). I had one from Africa although it was not postmarked :(

So to my friends abroad, please do send me postcards wherever you may roam. I will really appreciate it.

MUHAMMAD ALI THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL WORLD WEIGHT CHAMPION

Finally! Had my last day of finals today. Tackled the very difficult subject of Business Law.

I was very nervous about it since the tip that our prof gave us was to focus on terms and definitions. Since memorization is not my strongest suit, I just read through my reviewer and prayed he won't ask us to define terms.

I refused to study yesterday since all I wanted was to get it over with. When I came to school today, I was just hoping for the best. I instead, played with my new palm games and waited for our professor to arrive.

When he handed us our finals, it was basic matching type with a few modifications. I knew I could handle that and I managed to finish my finals in less than an hour. It helped that one way to figure out if you managed to answer everything perfectly, is that our answer will form a sentence. It may mean something or it may not mean something, but it's still a sentence. Maybe one thing that helped me figure out how to answer the finals, was that I love solving crossword puzzles and the such. Even if I was not sure of all the stuff I answered, I managed to do get the answers by the process of elimination and getting the right word to fit in the sentence.

I was the first one to submit my paper and he immediately corrected it showing me that I got a perfect grade (wonder if I can hope for a 4.0?)!

Wish all exams were this easy.

Leo and I also attended the wake of B's father yesterday. We arrived at Manila Memorial (it's my third time to go there this year. Three times is too many) around lunch time. We were a bit perturbed when we saw two adjacent rooms having the same name. Turns out that one room was reserved for the flowers and food, and the other room was where the body was lying in state. I was also pleasantly surprised when I saw that they had a Seattle's Best booth inside the room. Makes you want to stay the whole night!

Godson pic

Inaanak #2: Above is my favorite godson, Kiko. This picture was taken at Tagaytay for a picnic to celebrate my lola's birthday.

God-daughter

I was a popular choice for Ninang nowadays. This is one of my cute and lovable god-daughters. Her parents are good friends of mine (her mom is half-Japanese). She's turning three this November and she's quite a handful.

One Down

and another final exam to go. Today was supposed to be my last exam day. But due to inclement weather causing cancellation of classes for two consecutive days, my finals that was supposed to be held last Thursday was moved to Monday.

My Business Eco finals was so-so. It was comprehensive--that's for sure. Out of five questions, I think I got three right. I guess I won't be expecting that much high of a grade at course cards. As long as it's not a 2.5, I'll be fine.

Leo and I also celebrated our 6th month together today. Wow, it has been six months. Half a year! We had an early dinner at Italliani's, drank coffee at Dome and watched Princess Diaries 2 (I'm sorry, that movie does not even deserve a commentary. Much as I enjoyed the first movie, this movie does not make the cut). As my present to Leo, I had silver bracelets made with our names on them. So now, we're wearing two bracelets each, sporting each others names. Is that sweet or redundant? :)

Hellos and Goodbyes

I'm not much of a party person. I'm not even someone you may call a life of the party. I'm content to be just a participant (although there are times wherein I'm "forced" to be a host. But that's another story).

I went to two parties today. The first one was for my Business Law class held at Congo Grill Pasay Road, and the other party was at Krocodile Jupiter which was a despedida for my officemate who also happens to be a close friend.

I wanted to go to both parties because first, I wanted to bond with my classmates and perhaps, future groupmates and second, I also wanted to see the surprises we had planned for my officemate.

As luck may have it, I missed the salient points in the program of both parties. All I caught was the eating (hey, I actually got my money's worth of food!). However, they waited for me to give my speech at the despedida (which reduced me and our officemate to tears). Ganon pala yon? If you're forced to give an impromptu speech, you barely have time to think and all the words that come spilling out of your mouth comes from your heart. That's what Sands, my officemate, told me. My speech was the only one that made her cry because she knew it came from the heart.

When I first started working at SC four years ago, I was basically a loner. I ate lunch by myself and barely socialize with my other officemates. But on my first year, I was befriended by Rach. She was then, newly married and pregnant with her first child. She, together with Eu, were my lunchmates and confidantes. We would have lunch at the pantry and walk around at Megamall afterwards (this was when we were based in Ortigas).

Those two people were the first two real friends I ever had in that office. Rach was the first one who noticed that I'm a person who makes acquaintances easily, but rarely makes friends. I guess it's a big thing if I call a person, a friend. But then, not all my "friends" know that.

Less than a year after we transferred to Makati, Rach moved to another department leaving Eu and me alone to enjoy each others company. However, as luck would have it, our department was split into two separating me and Eu. Less than a year after we got separated, Eu was pirated by our previous boss and is now working for another company.

After we went our own ways, I returned to my old habit of having lunch by my lonesome or waiting for my other officemates to invite me out (which rarely happened). I didn't mind though since I'm comfortable with my own company. Moreover, I had God to talk with.

A couple of years ago, Sands joined us fresh from CB. I barely noticed her and was happy in my little corner. It was only by accident that we discovered that we shared the common passion for God, among other things. She started inviting me to have lunch with her and we were there in our little corner swapping Bible stories and personal experiences. It was a mini-prayer meeting at lunch. It was there that our friendship started.

When I was given more responsibilities, our manager grouped us three girls together: Sands, Jas and me. We would have lunch out together, consult with each other, laugh with each other and moreover, cry with each other. I knew then, that I found new friends who I can share my life with and for them to share their life with me.

But now the cycle starts once again. Sands resigned because of her wedding preparations and to help her husband with his business. Jas is due to resign soon since her husband is a nurse and they're due to leave--hopefully--by early next year.

It's sad for me to see all my friends go leaving me there in my little corner. But that's ok. As corny and as cheesy as it may sound, people come and go, but friends will always stay. Even if these people have gone to other places, they have touched my life and have imprinted in my memory, their presence and their characters. People whom I will always remember and whose goodness and beauty will forever reverberate through my life.

But you know, perhaps, I'll make new friends again. People who will discover me in my little corner. People who'll notice that I'm not another face in the wall and having a personality that's distinct and unique. Maybe there will come another Rach, Eu, Sands or Jas.

No Classes, No Work and a Funeral

Classes were called off the second day in a row. I guess it's also good that I've been on vacation leave for the past two days. Hopefully, the rains won't be as bad tomorrow since I'm going back to work. Our finals were also moved tomorrow.

Around 6 this morning, I received a text from a close friend that her mom died. I was barely awake and I texted our common friends and waited for news on where the wake/burial will be. At lunch time, in the middle of my pedicure session, her hubby called me and begged me to come for moral support. Unfortunately, he could not wait for me since they had to catch the mass before the cremation. Furthermore, the cremation was all the way at Sucat, Paranaque. I was ready to beg off but I knew I could not disappoint my friend so I tried to find another way.

To make the long story short, I just decided to take an expensive cab ride all the way to Sucat (cost me around Php200 inclusive of toll fees. Doh!). I got there while the cremation was ongoing and I chatted with her hubby while my friend was fixing the other cremation/post-cremation arrangements.

I stayed until they opened the viewing room showing the bereaved the cremated remains (wonder why the skeleton is white after burning? should it not be black?). They gathered the ashes in an urn and we hied off to the funeral parlor where her ashes, instead of the usual body, was displayed for viewing before it will be flown to Iloilo to her final resting place. Afterwhich, her hubby and I returned to Mandaluyong so he can pick up his mother to return to the wake and he dropped me off too.

I was not sorry that I went through all those hassle just for a friend who I haven't seen for a long time. But that's just the point. It was an opportunity for me to see her and my goddaughter as well (who has grown up to be a very cute kid--albeit a naughty one at that. Will show a picture soon).

I am French Vanilla!

Your Icecream Flavour is... French Vanilla!

You're a smooth and silky suave type! You exude class and you believe in tradition. A classical taste who doesn't like things to be too flashy or showy. Climb the Eiffel tower of taste with a spoonfull of you! Oui Oui!

What is your Icecream Flavour?

Find out at Go Quiz

How can I be vanilla? Was hoping for strawberry or mango.

Pagudpod

We visited Pagudpod, Ilocos last April. Here's one of the pictures that I took. Maybe one day, I'll be able to say that I visited all the beaches here in the Philippines. That might be quite a feat considering that there's 7100 islands. I guess this goes to show that I'm and always will be a beach person. I strive in the tropics and would no doubt be miserable in cold weather.

AVP and the Stepfords

(spoiler alert)

I'm allergic to the AVP initials since it reminds me too much of work (Assistant Vice President). Though I do wish that I have AVP status (not!), in this case AVP means Alien vs Predator (was going to say Predicate. doh!).

I was hesitant in watching AVP since I do not relish the thought of seeing mankind so helpless. However, the SO wanted to see it and after a bit of barganing, we went off to Greenbelt.

I did not expect much from the movie, but boy was I entertained! Entertained in a sense that I did nothing except pick fun at the cheesy dialogue (The enemy of our enemy is our friend. Hahahahahah) and absurd plotline (not to mention the misleading teasers). I found it hilarious when a Predator, who is supposed to be "superior" to the wheedling and worshipping humans, communicated with the only human left in the expedition. I expected more from him/it, but to describe a "bomb" in such a way was just humorous.

Leo said that he expected more action from it and there was less gore as compared to the Alien movies.

Bottom line, don't expect anything new in this movie. If you like cheese, then you'll like this.

STEPFORDS

This movie is a remake from a classic. I can't recall who were part of the first movie but this new one featured an amusing Nicole Kidman and Matthew Broderick. In the supporting roles are Glen Close, Christopher Walken and Bette Midler.

With such an outstanding cast, I expected so much from this movie, but the hole-ridden plotline brought everyone done. There were so many questions raised by the movie which it failed to answer in the end.

I'm sorry, my mind has been trained by my sci-fi/fantasy freak friends that I could not help but question their concept of robotics. It seemed so improbable that it's difficult for me to suspend reality just to accept their premise.

Bottom line, not worth watching. Although seeing Nicole Kidman and Faith Hill so dolled up could be nice. They're so pretty!

Accomplishments

I came home early today hoping to get a head start in studying for both my Law and Economics finals. Instead, I found myself fixing my blog and making it "friendlier" to my limited and accidental readers.

I've managed to figure out how to photoblog as well as to a tag or the tag feature.

So enjoy the read and please feel free to tag!

Subic

This was taken while we were at Subic last April (or was that May?). I don't know if it's clear, but you can see what a rainshower is. If the clouds are not too low and there are no large buildings about, I think this is what we're experiencing now. Talk about rainshowers and thunderstorms.

Max Brenner

A month ago, a friend and I met up and we lounged about at Max Brenner's Greenbelt 3 (I think I mentioned this in a previous post). Now, you get to see what we ate (but did not finish). The chocolate was so rich and thick and the cake was just divine.

AT LAST!

Hah! I managed to figure out this photo-blogging thing. :D
Now, I can post and share as many photos as I want! Mwahahahaha!

You are a Trekkie!

Which internet subculture do I belong to? [CLICK] You are a Trekkie! It's a geek, Jim! You probably have a starfleet uniform and a tricorder. Bonus points if you speak klingon. One day you will walk down the aisle with your buttertroll trekkie partner, humming to the Yoyager theme. More Quizzes at Go-Quiz.com

Why am I a Trekkie? I barely watch the series anyway. Must be something which I got from my friends.

5 lbs

That's the amount of poundage that I lost in a month. My doctor was more excited than I am for the weight loss. Our aim was actually only 1 to 2 lbs a month. She's looking at a 5 year plan for me to lose all these excess and bad weight. Hopefully, the loss will be dramatic in 6 months so I can return to my regular cycle.

I had my ovaries, thyroid gland and whatever organ that should interrupt with my cycle tested. All of them (including my testosterone level---yes, we women also have that) are within the normal bracket. I just had to accept the fact that I'm naturally fat. That I'm fat not because of any organ or hormonal imbalance, but just because I eat a lot and have led a sedentary lifestyle.

I lost those 5 lbs, I guess most of it, last weekend. I think I mentioned in my previous post that we had to finish reading this 72 page paper and during that day, we also had an oral report (with a small percentage that we will be called to report). I barely had something to eat for breakfast because I found myself engrossed in the paper (The Asian Financial Crisis. Wow. So exciting!). I also decided to skip lunch since my partner and I were still putting some finishing touches on our report. I only had one bottle of gatorade which sustained me the rest of the day.

When Leo came to fetch me from school, I was beside myself with hunger. We went to Greenbelt and while waiting for Leo to cool down from the heat outside, I brought myself a light snack and proceeded to eat verrryyyy sloooowwwllly. I did not want to "surprise" my stomach with a heavy meal.

I was eating less than usual before that and that sort of set the stage for the decrease in my food intake. Hopefully, I would be able to sustain this.

Now comes the disadvantage of losing all these weight. What will I wear now? I can't afford a wardrobe overhaul. Hopefully, I can find something in my closet which would fit me. I think I haven't given away some of my old clothes yet.

Five, Six, Seven Days

It's finals week again. Another week of sleepless nights and frayed nerves. My finals for Business Law will be on Thursday plus a mandatory class party (can you believe that attendance will be 15% of the grade?! Where's the equity, fairness and justice in that?!) for the aforementioned subject on Friday and Business Economics finals will be on the succeeding day (Saturday afternoon).

I'm taking a couple of days off from work on Wednesday and Thursday. Hopefully, that would give me ample time to cram 14 weeks worth of lectures into my brain. It does not help that our law finals will be theoretical in nature (unlike our midterms which was something akin to a case analysis). I still have no idea what our economics finals will be like but I pray to the high heavens that it will be UNLIKE our midterms which, literally squeezed every economics knowledge from my brain. I was reduced to playing the addicting Bejeweled game afterwards (I did pass that--by the skin of my teeth!).

Even with the tons of readings and analysis, I'm grateful for these subjects. I just finished reading a 72 page paper on the Asian Financial Crisis in preparation for our discussion later and I'm still trying to sort the information out in my mind. We also have a reporting as well regarding Economic figures and whatsoever during that.

If I survive this week without losing my mind, I'm going to relax next week. I don't know how I'll be able to do that considering that "term break" is only for two weeks. But at least I won't have Saturday classes again next term.

TEN DAYS

to go before the end of the month. Time surely flies by so fast (especially when you're having fun?). It's been one year since I started my MBA (and since I met Leo. Hehe). I'm formally starting my core subjects next term: Ethics and Marketing Management. I'm a bit nervous about Marketing since anything related to selling and PR is not my strong point. Contrary to what people think, I'm actually an introvert by nature. Second term of SY 2004-2005 will formally start on the 13th of September.

Norrie's Daily Planet

Want to have a glimpse of what British life is all about? Here's a link to my aunt's blogspot who's based in Honiton, England. I love reading her posts, I hope you will too.

In case you're wondering, she's one hell of a writer and her grammar is definitely more impeccable than mine.

Assembly

Our bank had a general assembly last night at the swanky Manila Polo Club. The bank chorale (which I am a member of) was recruited to sing the opening number (a tacky rendition of Starship's "We Built this City" although changing the last word to SCB). The program's theme was "SCB School of Rock", which was derived from the Consumer Banking Regional Meeting last February. Everyone came in their rock outfit best.

The assembly confirmed what we've always known, and have somehow affirmed our belief that our profit sharing next year won't be as impressive as this year's. Our division has been floundering in the first half, with the other division outperforming us in terms of business deals and net profit made. The other division showcased their recent deals and were we astounded by the amount of currencies they dealt with. We're talking of Euro dollars and US dollars in the millions and Philippines pesos in the billions! I was suddenly embarrassed by our measly performance. At least we're already in the black.

Have to cut this short. Just remembered that I have a couple of law papers to finish. I'm so glad that this will be last. It's our finals next week!!! Aaaargh!!! And our prof just told us that his finals will be purely theoretical and closed books! We'll be like law students studying for a condensed bar exam.

Recommended Restaurant: Plato Platina (Bluewave, Roxas Blvd). SO has been raving about that place for months! We were supposed to go there for our 3rd month celebration but were only able to do so last weekend. Place is fine dining and you should try their paella! It's what they're known for and definitely a bestseller! I don't know if I was just hungry but it was definitely delicious!